It’s irrefutable, scientific fact that a show is good if Charlotte Ritchie is in it. Fresh from her success in.. well, bloody everything, the second series of Dead Pixels arrives to dispel January and Lockdown gloom. Charlotte plays Alison, long suffering housemate to gamer geeks Meg and Nicky. So far, so standard flatshare sitcom? Thankfully, most of the show is spent in an imaginary online world under the guise of a game called Kingdom Scrolls rather than their strangely tidy but dull home. However hard they may try to escape the real world, the truth is that domesticity creeps unrelentingly into their fantasy land. Divided by a wall, they converse (well, bicker) about work and friendships while performing to fish people with man legs or slaying innocent cows. The undercurrent of any tiny bit of sexual tension the pair may have spills over as pixelated dry humping *MAKES CONTINUOUS RETCHING NOISES*
The show’s success isn’t just down to Ritchie though. Writer Jon Brown has an embarrassment of riches on his CV including Mongrels, Peep Show, Fresh Meat and Succession. Here he has used his personal passion for gaming and produced a cynical, filthy love letter to it. As someone who’s last games console was an N64 I confidently predict that you don’t have to worry about the in-jokes. Then there’s Alexa Davies who plays the misguided confidence of Meg beautifully. Will Merrick’s Nicky is an unsuccessful version of James Acaster from a parallel universe. These people are not good at life. It’s questionable if they’re even good at Kingdom Scrolls. Dim-witted dancing playmate Russel (David Mumeni) is definitely bad at both and a permanent but hilarious annoyance. Making up the team is Usman (Sargon Yelda) the pilot who doesn’t fly, offering dubious words of wisdom from his cupboard,
Which begs the question, why is Dead Pixels tucked away on The Big Bang Theory Channel? Some people refer to it as E4. While comparisons to Peep show are understandable this is a unique show that’s lovingly crafted with quickfire writing and strong performances. Promote it. Sell it. Be proud of it. There was critical acclaim for the first run but there is a hollow feeling this won’t find the bigger audience it deserves. Television is a very confused world right now. Some shows go weekly, some shows are put up as a boxset immediately and it is difficult to get the balance right when there is so much content. Look at us. Spooning all this delicious content into our mouths. NOM NOM NOM NOM. Content. Content. Content! If Friday Night Dinner can gain a large following from showing at primetime on a, yes you guessed it, Friday night then so can Dead Pixels. Tuesday nights at 10pm on E4? That’s a bit rubbish isn’t it? TV executives, Meg is scowling at you. Oh no, sorry, that’s just her face.
Now that we’ve ticked over into a decade that actually has a name it’s time to process a time that many have named a “golden age” in television. By the way, if you’re one of those people who actually think the twenties start in 2021 then stop reading this blog because you are clearly insane and need help. And a calendar. When we’re born we’re not suddenly aged one are we?! There’s a bit of time between! They’re called months!
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Sorry, where was I? Ah yes. Here is my personal list of my favourite shows of the last ten years. There’s no Fleabag because no matter how good it is there’s the inescapable feeling that it is overrated. There’s no Game of Thrones either. I saw the first episode and once you’ve seen Emelia Clarke naked it’s not going to get any better than that is it?
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This has been an intense work about a great passion of mine.. TV that is – not Emelia Clarke’s bum. That’s a blog for another time. Feel free to debate, disagree and even rave about the show’s in my list. It’s all a matter of opinion. There will never be a definitive list because art speaks to us in many different ways. These are the show’s that made my heart beat faster, made me laugh and made me cry. God bless television…
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30: What Remains (BBC1) 2013
David Threlfall couldn’t be further from Frank Gallagher here. As Detective Len Harper he finds himself on the other side of the law in this claustrophobic whodunnit. When the decomposed body of a woman is found in an apartment all of the houses residents are suspects. Intriguingly and thoughtfully paced, What Remains is an underrated work.
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29: Catastrophe (Channel 4) 2015-19
From a dysfunctional couple to an even more dysfunctional family, creators Sharon Horgan and Rob Delaney put their namesakes through the mill with a mixture of highly developed intelligent comedy and plenty of potty mouthed goodness. A warts and all look into modern relationships.
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28: People Just Do Nothing (BBC3) 2014-18
The mockumentary on a mock pirate radio station kurupt FM. Consider yourself mocked with strange garage beats and the ridiculous adventures of a gang with the common sense of school children. Funnier that Craig David’s back catalogue, People Just Do Nothing has a unique flow and poetry to its comedy.
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27: Rhod Gilbert’s Work Experience (BBC Wales) 2010-18
It’s official, Rhod Gilbert can make anything funny. In one of the episodes he works in a hotel and changes beds yet manages to weild more laughs than Basil Fawlty achieved before serving breakfast. He flies a plane, becomes a vet and even poses as a male model. However, what truly makes the show is Rhod’s gruff, cynical and quick-fire narration. His unrelenting one-liners prove he should stick with being a comedian.
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26: Doctor Foster (BBC1) 2015-17
Suranne Jones gives a powerhouse performance as a woman betrayed by the equally screen stealing Bertie Carvel. It’s a small town show with grand ideas, some of them absolutely barmy, but Mike Bartlett’s script pushes the intrigue and suspense to extreme levels. It’s a theatre play portrayed as a glossy small screen spectacle. Doctor Foster is about the complexities of adult relationships but with a heightened, melodramatic fizz.
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25: Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle (BBC2) 2009-2016
You know Stewart Lee, you’ve seen him. On the telly. His Comedy Vehicles are thirty minute, meandering diatribes and they are essential. Between his takes on “The UKIPS” and Chris Moyles, Lee berates himself and the audience in ever decreasing stages of madness. Iconic television that deserved more love.
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24: Broadchurch (ITV) 2013-17
It’s easy to forget the cultural impact of Broadchurch back in the first season. The nation was hooked on the mystery of Danny Latimer’s death but it was in the harrowing effect on the local community where writer Chris Chibnall really struck gold. David Tennant and Olivia Colman as Hardy and Miller, two cops thrown together, were the definition of chemistry.
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Yes, series two was a bit of a letdown but the change of direction in the last run got the show back within touching distance of greatness again with a difficult subject handled with class. Series one won’t just be a classic of the last ten years, it will forever be a classic nonstop.
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23: Taskmaster (Dave) 2015-
Put a bunch of comedians in a room and you’re bound to be entertained. Get them to do ridiculous tasks and put them in a room to talk about doing the ridiculous tasks and you have an instant comedy franchise. Greg Davies and Alex Horne monitor proceedings in the hope things get out of hand and they often do. For instance, that time Liza Tarbuck got Alex to sit on a cake with his naked bottom.
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22: Bang (S4C) 2017-
A multilingual crime drama based in Port Talbot, Bang was an intense thriller which was essentially about one single gun and the chain of effects it has. Dark, twisty and so beautifully shot the town itself was a main character. Stories are rarely told from these corners of Britain and the good news is there’s a second series starts in early 2020.
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21: Stranger Things (Netflix) 2016-
It was acceptable in the 2010s. Hmm, not quite so catchy is it? The Duffer brothers piled on the nostalgia and dayglow horror to provide Netflix with one of their biggest ever hits. While evil tree branchy type things are the focus of the show’s evil, Stranger Things is all the classic buddy movies brought to the small screen.
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Let’s face it, things with child actors are usually fucking awful but the show’s biggest success is how wonderful the main cast are. The third series saw an evolution and change of direction so hopes are high for the future of Stranger Things.
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20: Dave Gorman: Modern Life Is Goodish(Dave) 2013-17
Imagine Black Mirror if it was much more obscure and performed by a comedian. That’s the pitch. Dave Gorman is in the form of his life as he studies the intricacies of modern day living with his own unique perspectives. Be it online shopping, hassling Alan Sugar with billboards or furrowing the real depths of the internet – the comment sections. Cynical but warm, opinionated but friendly. Modern Life is Goodish was most excellentish.
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19: Cucumber (Channel 4) 2015
Russell T. Davies wrote a study on modern day homosexuality through they eyes of Henry (the excellent Vincent Franklin) a middle-aged man who has his life turned upside down after a party that involves a death. He flees his previously stable relationship to house share with a flat full of young strangers led by 19 year old Dean.
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In typical Davies style Cucumber is laced with innuendo and high energy plotting. It’s some of the bravest drama commited to television. It’s funny and heartbreaking and leaves you on a constant seesaw between the two. There is one particular scene that is so shocking it’ll effect you for days. You’ll know it when you see it.
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While being crude without ever being tasteless, Cucumber was always about the bigger message. By challenging society’s perceptions of gayness and all sexuality it stands the test of time. The last, subtle line uttered by Henry is quite the ending for this one and done series.
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18: Spotless (Netflix) 2015
Jean Bastiere’s life was perfect on the surface with his lovely family and big house but appearances are deceiving. His job could almost be a metaphor for he runs a business that cleans up after crime scenes. His world is turned upside down when his brother Martin visits with a freezer and a dead body inside. Like you do. What follows is a chain of events that spiral out of control, so much so they end up working for a mob by clearing up their dirty work.
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Spotless is dramatic, cinematic and full of bleak humour in the darkest of circumstances. It’s the compelling story of a good man taken way out of his comfort zone but it’s Denis Menochet who plays Martin’s scruffy womanising bad boy with glee that steals the show.
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As compelling as it was gory, a second series was on the cards but sadly it seems network wranglings have put paid to those hopes. We’ll have to keep Spotless as an eternal sunshine of our minds.
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17: Misfits (E4) 2009-2015
Not all superheroes wear capes – some wear boilersuits. Cruder than Superman in a brothel, more disgusting than Batman’s coke habit but funnier than Ardal O’ Hanlon in My Hero. Seriously.
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Five juvenile offenders team up to do community service but a freak thunderstorm gives them powers they don’t understand and the magical ability to kill all their probation officers. Clumsy.
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If Misfits had been American then it’d have been glossy and the superpowers would have been useful. Instead these delinquents botch their way through misadventures while trying to shag eachother.
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Misfits flows with energy and off-kilter weirdness. From the bizarre (sample line: “Fuck the Tortoise, Alex”) to the blasphemous (THAT nativity scene).
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While it didn’t quite adjust to an entirely new cast with as much comfort as a certain show that is higher on this list, Misfits was and will always be a riot.
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16: My Mad Fat Diary (E4) 2013-15
An eye-catching take on teenage life based on the real-life experiences and book of Rae Earl. It’s Sharon Rooney’s task to express Rae’s issues with body image, mental health and self-abuse and she does so with great dignity and humour. If this had been a movie and not tucked away on E4 then all the awards would have been falling at Rooney’s feet
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Set in the nineties, My Mad Fat Diary tells the story of her interegration into a group of school friends, one of whom is Chloe, played by the then up and coming Jodie Comer. You may have heard of her?
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Colourful, brash and highly inventive yet all that still ignores the kick ass nineties soundtrack. By using The Charlatans’ ‘One To Another’ as the theme song it was never going to do wrong was it?
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15: Sherlock (BBC1) 2010-17
These Sherlock Holmes adventures set in present day London were full of writer’s Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss’ usual sense of wonder and wilful deception. Everything clicked from the first minute and in Benedict Cumberbatch a rising star shone brightly.
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The feature length episodes flew by with the help of brilliant dialogue and eye-catching cinematography, a lot of which has been copied to death since. Sherlock was fun and over the top but it’s extremity was what made it a trendsetter. Incredibly crafted plotlines took unexpected tangients and series 4, which many hated, was all the madness spilling over. Did it jump the shark by the end? Yes. Was it still highly watchable crime drama with twists galore? Absolutely.
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14: Uncle (BBC3) 2014-17
Nick Helm plays the dishevelled Andy who is forced to be young Errol’s (Elliot Speller-Gillott) uncle in nature more than just in name and a beautiful if strange friendship results. So far, so very twee you’re thinking? Except it’s done under the influence of alcohol and drug addiction while bursting into inappropriate songs. Dylan Moran even appears as a wizard. Potty mouthed but full of emotional resonance, Uncle was a family pack of laughter.
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13: Black Mirror (Channel 4 & Netflix) 2011-
Black Mirror’s first ever episode involved the Prime Minister fucking a pig and that’s one of the more normal plots that bears resembence to our times. Charlie Brooker’s anthology series on mankind’s relationship with technology might have dystopian overtones but sometimes the stories reflect the news in the months that follow transmission.
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Dark, twisted, satirical, frightening and sometimes, just sometimes funny. A constant parade of strong casts and intriguing plots mean Black Mirror continues to be worryingly relevant and episodes such as ‘San Junipero’ and ‘Hang The DJ’ prove it’s not all doom and gloom.
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12: Luther (BBC1) 2010-2019?
Idris Elba is commanding as detective John Luther. Sure, his personal life is complex but it gets a lot weirder when he runs into Alice Morgan (played with a devilish viguer by Ruth Wilson). Alice is a murderer our antagonist can’t lock up. Against all odds they form a crime fighting partnership which surprisingly doesn’t follow rules.
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In short, Luther is a mad show. A crime drama that’s permanently heightened and that’s where the fun lies. Writer Neil Cross revels in the world of this alternative London with a dark hearted crime drama that’s both thrilling and extremely gory. It’s a near perfect balance of murder mystery and action. You’re either not into Luther or you’re along for the whole ride. Just don’t get the night bus, eh?
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11: Happy Valley (BBC1) 2014-
Writer and creator Sally Wainwright had a prolific decade of not just hit television, but top quality television at that. Last Tango In Halifax, Scott & Bailey and Gentlemen Jack add to what was an already impressive CV but arguably the high-water mark is Happy Valley.
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Sarah Lancashire is sensational as police sergeant Catherine Caewood, a woman struggling with her daughter’s suicide and living with her alcoholic sister. Tommy Lee Royce, played by James Norton who is clearly enjoying going dark side. Tommy has recently been released from prison. The thing is, he raped Catherine’s daughter and was ultimately responsible for for her death, not that he got locked up for that. His new found freedom causes fractures in catherines personal and work life.
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Gritty is a word that could sum up Happy Valley as the backdrop for all this is a small working class town riddled with poverty and addiction. These are themes that run through the show.
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The dialogue is so masterfully constructed and real to life and an impressive cast brings life to this little world with big problems. Wainwright has such a natural ability to make characters real and not just half-arsed sketches.
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Despite such a huge chasm of time since the last series there is a third in the works but it’s likely we’ll have to wait at least a couple more years. The pace of life in the country is slower to be fair.
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10: Inside No.9 (BBC2) 2014-
From the, let’s say perverse, minds that gave us The League Of Gentlemen and Psychoville came a horror anthology as shocking as it was surprising. Reece Shearsmith and Steve Pemberton dreamt up the surreal, the creepy, the mad and everything else on the bonkers spectrum.
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By it’s very nature there will be episodes that disappoint, it’s range of tone and subjects won’t translate to everyone at all times, but if you don’t take to one episode it’s likely you’ll fall in love with the next. When it excels it’s one of the best things committed to telly. The variation and depth of material is to be respected.
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The silent episode ‘A Quiet Night In’ was the first hint that we had something special but the tone always shifts. Take ‘The 12 Days of Christine’ which is genuinely heartbreaking. Or Zanzibar which is a hotel based farce spoken entirely in spoof Shakespearian. In ‘Diddle Diddle Dumpling’ a man becomes obsessed with a stray shoe. There’s plenty more where that came from.
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2018’s live Halloween special could have been the moment Inside No.9 ate itself but they mastered every detail to perfection and so high was the concept they got viewers switching off in droves. That’s art that is.
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The new decade will usher in the fifth series and as usual we have no idea what to expect other the the number nine being involved. Who knows, maybe even that’s not a guarantee.
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9: Detectorists (BBC4) 2014-17
In a decade where cynicism grew exponentially, MacKenzie Crook offered an obscure form of light relief. Tucked away on BBC4 and offering a comforting hug to those who discovered it in the ditches of the TV schedules, Detectorists was never really about metal detecting – it was about friendship. Hapless though Lance and Andy were the important thing is they were nice. That’s it. It’s not very fashionable is it? We willed them to be better with women. We hoped they would find their pot of gold.
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Through stunning shots of the English countryside Detectorists brought a warm glow even if the weather conditions were drizzly. Lance and Andy nattering about nonsense was the heart of the show of course but no show is complete without a nemesis and in the ridiculous form of the ‘Antiquisearchers’ (or Simon & Garfunkel to be more precise) they definitely didn’t meet their match. So much comic gold was mined when the pairs squared up against each other.
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Let’s also not forget the oddball characters that made up the Danebury Metal Detecting Club and their awkward, mostly pointless meetings. It all added to a small world with a big heart. This should go down as an all-time classic comedy, one that gave our flawed antiheroes the ending they deserved.
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8: Community (NBC & Yahoo Screen) 2009-2015
Meet Jeff Winger, a lawyer who finds himself at Greendale Community College after having his degree revoked. Jeff stands as the morale conscience of the show despite not having many morals. He meets dipsy Troy, geeky Abed, grouchy Pierce, bubbly Shirley, cutesy Annie and not so brittle Britta. They’re the seven dwarfs of pop culture references and meta comedy.
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What starts out as pretty standard fare soon blossoms into a programme full of creativity and fierce intelligence. Community starts descending, or rather ascending into a world of crazy parodies and obscure ideas with the crazy dial up at eleven. There’s the spectacular episode where we visit many different timelines including Abed’s darkest. There’s the paintball episodes where Greendale keeps becoming a surreal shooting range. Then there’s the episode that is entirely animated. If these sound a bit too gimmicky then there’s the bottle episode where they’re in one room just looking for Annie’s pen.
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Creator and lead writer Dan Harmon (now in charge of Rick And Morty) was absent from the often ridiculed fourth series which the show itself later referred to as “the gas leak year”. We had six seasons in the end but will we ever get the movie?
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7: Mongrels (BBC3) 2010-11
RUSSELL HOWARD’S EYES! Yes this is a high placing and it’s fully deserved. Welcome to the back garden of a pub in the Isle of Dogs, this way madness lies. Maybe “welcome” isn’t the word because being called a cunt may not be considered de rigueur in polite society… and this isn’t polite society. Only posh fox Nelson could fall under that category for he’s a metro-sexual il Divo fan.
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The rest of the puppet reprobates that make up the cast are Vince the sweary fox, Kali the bad pun pigeon and Destiny the selfish dog but the less said about her the better (if only they’d followed up on the hint that she’d died at the end of series one) Lastly, and certainly not least there’s Marion the bin dwelling cat who is many furballs short of common sense.
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While clearly influenced by fast-paced American comedies, Mongrels revels in the shitness of Britain. It’s crude, lewd and even offensive if you’re of a certain disposition. No subjects are off limits and it proved more cutting than any satirical show out there. They managed to do this in stories about Marion getting stuck in a wheel and training Michael Jackson’s monkey to stop masturbating.
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It’s scattered with pop culture references, some of which have admittedly dated in the past ten years but many still stick. There’s also lots of brief appearances from celebrities willing to be ridiculed. Let’s face it, some are more known than others. Who’s Paul Ross?
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Then there are the songs, oh boy, those songs. Marion’s ode to his underage sweetheart Lollipop, Nelson’s tourist advertisement for Millwall (“No-one’s been stabbed here since Friday / Arson is on the decline”). The previously mentioned monkey singing of his desire to murder Justin Bieber. There are so many slices of inappropriate should have been hits.
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The attention to detail in both the puppetry and blink and you miss them visual jokes show a real creativity that’s gone into making of the show. The voice work is exceptional too with nods to Rufus Jones as Nelson and Dan Tetsell’s baffling transilvanian accent for Marion being the true stars of the show.
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Mongrels was cut short when in its prime as the best things often are, like Princess Diana and Fuse bars.
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6: Utopia (Channel 4) 2013-14
Meeting people you know online in real life isn’t as frowned upon as it once was but if Utopia is anything to go by, perhaps it should be. Foul mouthed Becky (Alexandra Roach), straight laced Ian (Nathan Stewart-Jarrett) and the paranoid Wilson Wilson (Adeel Akhtar) had been chatting together on a forum about ‘The Utopia Experiment’. This is a graphic novel which allegedly predicted the disasters of the previous century but it’s the unpublished follow up which everyone thinks will save the human race, that makes people lose their minds.
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This new strange alliance sets out to find the manuscript for good reasons but ‘The Network’ want it for bad and go on a killing spree. Neil Maskell is fascinating as the sullen Arby, the murderer who has his own catchphrase in “Where is Jessica Hyde?!” We, the viewer soon find her and she’s played with relish by Fiona O’ Shaughnessy.
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In keeping with the comic book theme, the palette in Utopia is visually striking with its bright, bold colours where yellow is the stand out. Look very closely and you’ll see how much it subtly filters into virtually every element of the show. It adds to the uniqueness of a thriller that would stand on its own anyway.
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The brilliant soundtrack supplied by Cristobal Tapia de Veer is another important factor. The electronic glitches and uneasy bleeps sit perfectly with the oddness of the world Dennis Kelly has created. Imagine The Chemical Brothers on antidepressants.
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Utopia is darkly comic and comically gruesome. While not the fastest moving of shows, the storytelling, humour and sense of farce are what give the urgency. Never a show to play it safe, so much so that the first episode of the second run was a genesis story featuring none of the main cast. From humble beginnings to eugenics and the dark forces behind it, this was a television masterclass and it’s influence on television dramas that followed is clear.
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Everyone on the screen is playing a blinder (that’s an in-joke for fans) but there are two stand out performances. Alexandra Roach embodies the opinionated and strong willed Becky with classic one liners and Adeel Akhtar’s nerdy, complex Wilson Wilson is so good they named him twice.
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If Utopia has one major flaw it’s that there was no resolution. The story hadn’t finished and that is an insult to the writer, cast and fans. Series two ended on a cliffhanger and then Channel 4 pulled the plug. The Network were evil commissioners all along. There was talk of a streaming site taking it on but nothing ever materialised. There is however an American remake in the offing but that must be greeted with cynicism. The original story wasn’t fully told, why start a new one? There wasn’t a show like this before and there hasn’t been one since. Utopia is small screen paradise – if paradise involves a lot of bad language and killing.
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5: Peaky Blinders (BBC1) 2013-
Back in 2013 the thought of Cillian Murphy playing a gangster would have seemed like we’d entered Abed’s dark timeline again. “Remember I’m an actor” he told writer Steven Knight when doubts were raised and what an actor he is. This slight, pretty man inhabited the demons of Tommy Shelby and made him walk tall into TV history.
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Peaky Blinders tells the story of a family between two wars. Brothers Tommy and Arthur are struggling to cope after returning as soldiers. Their PTSD manifests itself in different ways, Tommy is the brains of the operation and Arthur is the attack dog. The Shelby Company limited sets up an illegal bookies and they also start exporting booze and drugs. Needless to say they get caught up with all the wrong kinds of people. Or wronger kind of people.
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Peaky manages to be extremely violent and yet sumptuous to watch. It is crafted to near perfection to create a believable if grim world. Aesthetically no other show can compare as a period piece with this amazing interpretation of the times.
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Backed up by a stellar cast including Helen McCrory and Sophie Rundle and guests such as Sam Neil, Paddy Considine and some bloke called Tom Hardy, Peaky Blinders continues to deliver shocks and emotional gut punches. Should we care so much about a criminal gang? Of course not but the combination of Knight’s writing, the remarkable direction, loud as fuck soundtrack and perfect cast means we can loosen our morals a little.
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4: No Offence (Channel 4) 2015-18
Crime Dramas have been ten a penny the last ten years but creator Paul Abbott had his own take on the genre. Sure, there were elements of ‘Shameless’ in the DNA but this was like no show ever seen before. No Offence was chaotic, bizarre and hard hitting. It was fast moving and dialogue heavy, so much so it could almost be disorientating. Hilarious one liners and ludicrous situations mixed effortlessly with big issues such as the murders of girls with Downs Syndrome, child slavery and far right politics.
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With all that going on you need the performances to pay off so step forward Joanna Scanlan as Viv Deering. Viv is intense, playful, hard as nails and vulnerable. Most of all though she’s funny as hell. There’s so many wonderful quotes that there’s no point going into them all. If she’s not using breath spray on her privates she’s breaking the rules in her own style. Deering has to go down as one the TV greats.
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It’s not all about Viv though. No Offence is an ensemble piece and everyone has their moments. Elaine Cassidy as the intensely moral but wayward Dina gives the performance of her career. Alexandra Roach as the innocent but kick ass Joy is a revelation. Then there’s Paul Ritter having the time of his life as Miller, a man who revels in the moribundity of it all and takes everything that bit too far. He is outstanding and one of his greatest moments came when he shouted “I’VE GOT GOAT ON ME!” before licking it off his coat “No, it’s Curry” Oh, by the way, they blew up a goat with a bomb. Of course they did.
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Sadly this year Channel 4 announced that No Offence was not coming back and that is a dreadful loss. Television needs brave, visionary storytelling like this. One day it will be considered as a classic and when it is Viv will be raising a wry smile knowing she was right all along. As always.
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3: Car Share (BBC1) 2015-18
On paper Car Share had all the appeal of being stuck in traffic with Jack Whitehall as a your passenger. Frankly, the premise of two colleagues going to and from work is hardly something to get the pulse racing. In an age where comedies are fast paced, abruptly edited and over the top, Car Share proved there’s hilarity in the mundane and plenty of heart in the normal. While it defied genre norms it also set a benchmark by smashing iPlayer viewing records.
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If you’re looking for epic plot twists and convoluted storylines then you won’t find them on the not so mean streets of Bolton. If however you want to see someone accidentally drink some piss then this is for you. It’s the mix of slapstick and intelligently observed long-form conversation that gives Car Share a warm, comforting feel and that’s nothing to do with the urine.
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Charm is a word used way too often in TV circles but this has it in spades. Two opposites collide and the results are fun and often bizarre. John (Peter Kay) is a grumpy cynic worn down by years of middle management. Kayleigh (Sian Gibson) on the other hand is the bright, perky and sometimes irritating angel on his shoulder. John’s view out of the windscreen is a foggy grey mist whereas Kaleigh sees sunshine and rainbows through the same glass. The actor’s real-life friendship shows on the screen. Opposites attract as the wise prophet Paula Abdul once said.
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Speaking of pop music, let’s hear it for the show’s third main character – Forever FM. The local radio station it’s ok to listen to. It’s upbeat music and oddball adverts soundtrack the show’s feel good tone perfectly. While your ears digest the cheese your eyes are distracted by ridiculous road signs and billboards. Ugly city landscapes are turned into comedy art. The attention to detail isn’t just in the script. Just don’t mention that dirty back window.
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While Peter Kay is on top form, the undoubted star of the car is Sian Gibson. Her portrayal of quirky Kayleigh is totally endearing. No-one has delivered a line about an iceberg lettuce quite so beautifully.
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There are so many classic moments from John’s loudspeaker call to his boss to Kayleigh’s neighbour going dogging. The standout might just be Reece Shearsmith’s appearance as a smelly fishmonger with anger issues. His scenes are full of such joy and the three of them together is comedy gold. Who doesn’t need a whiffy rendition of ‘Here Comes The Hotstepper?’
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They almost messed things up by giving the second series just four episodes that culminated in an unhappy ending. Due to public demand they came back with two specials in order to prevent the politest riot ever. Curiously one was an unscripted special which basically amounted to a DVD extra. The finale made up for everything though with an ending that was happy but not overly saccharine.
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Car Share first aired in 2015 and if you feel weighed down by all the gloom of current affairs then why not treat yourself to a rewatch and transport yourself back to more innocent times. Yes, it’s been a really long decade indeed but thank God John and Kayleigh were there to make us smile.
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2: Line Of Duty (BBC1) 2012-
First put out in 2012 during what will potentially be our last ever summer of love, Line Of Duty was the antithesis of the countries mood. While everybody was preoccupied with the Olympics and being proud of our country AC-12 were rooting out bent coppers before it was fashionable.
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Comprised of Ted Hastings (Adrian Dunbar) Kate Fleming (Vicky McClure) and Steve Arnott (Martin Compston) the anti-corrupton unit were hot on the tail of Tony Gates, a man they believed to be fiddling the figures. What seemed like a fantastic one series arc soon bleeds onto the new story of series two. Keeley Hawes took on the role of the hunted for one of the best moments of her career. From then on each new run catches you off guard and pulls your pants down. Everything, no matter how unconnected it seems, turns out to be part of a far bigger conspiracy.
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Jed Mercurio’s writing is so intricate and clever. Things don’t make the final draft for no reason. The sheer audacity to stick to the conspiracy whilst throwing in curveballs as bullets is the sign of a master at work. In Line of Duty he has created a vibrant, suspenseful thriller, the like of which has not been seen before. Far from being boring, thirty minute interrogation scenes are heart racing slabs of perfect melodrama. The beat to those interviews are almost hypnotic.
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Adrian Dunbar is in great form as Ted, a man so full of principles he might burst and let some secrets out. He’s authoritative, charming and has many a catchphrase to cause a chuckle in the most heated of moments. But every good man needs a nemesis and AC-12 has had its fair share so it’s worth mentioning that Lennie James, Keeley Hawes, Daniel Mays, Thandie Newton and Stephen Graham have all been worthy adversaries. All villains with shade and complexity. If they walked on stage at a panto they wouldn’t get booed. They’d be greeted by confusion. Mainly because five year olds won’t have watched Line of Duty. Craig Parkinson’s excellently sinister Dot would not only get booed but kicked out the theatre – by the children’s parents.
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2020 will see our favourite anti-corrupton unit (BOO TO AC-9!) return. Is Ted really dodgy? Will Arnott buy some more waistcoats? Just remember one thing – don’t trust anyone.
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1: Being Human (BBC3) 2009-2013
“So a werewolf, a ghost and a vampire decide to live like humans do. They get jobs, a house and a TV license. They make friends they will lie to, take lovers they will infect-in fact, the only part of humanity they successfully adopt is its ability to deceive and destroy”
A small scale domestic drama with a supernatural twist. It’s a simple houseshare premise but this time the inhabitants are a vampire, a ghost and a werewolf. The scope of creator Toby Whithouse’s vision meant BBC Three’s modest little show transcended it’s humble beginnings. The balance between mundane domesticity and ambitious science fiction is just part of what makes Being Human truly special. This isn’t grandiose Dracula style mythology nor is it tepid Twilight / Vampire Diaries nonsense.
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Initially set in Bristol with Mitchell (Aidan Turner) George (Russell Tovey) and Annie (Lenora Crichlow), series one could almost be classed as the innocent times. Innocent here translates as bloody killings, haunting your ex from the grave, being accused of fiddling with kids and a gruesome battle with an arch enemy. The masterstroke is that all these things happened between conversations about mouli graters and Marigolds. This balance continued perfectly throughout all five series. Switching between brooding intensity and full-on funny within seconds came naturally to a show that never played it safe. There were two mass murder sprees and a baby was blown up yet this doesn’t come close to describing the blood shed or services rendered as Mr. Snow might say. This deep mood is darkened further by composer Richard Well’s atmospheric original score.
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Being Human evolved further with a move to Barry Island and enforced cast changes that would’ve been a stake through the heart of most shows. In series four and five we were gifted with newcomer Damien Molony and his awkward bromance with Michael Socha’s Tom which, along with a move deeper into science fiction territory gave proceedings a new lease of life when it wasn’t thought to be needed. Kate Bracken’s Alex soon completed a new trio that weren’t given enough time together because the axe fell in 2013. While general consensus lies with the original trio being the best, what followed them is extremely underrated. The first three years may have been more consistent but when the last two years peaked the episodes were equal to and sometimes even better than the original incarnation. ‘Making History’ stands atop a very busy podium.
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One of the biggest factors in Being Human landing the top spot is the dialogue. Oozing with quotability and natural conversation, everything flows so bloody well. There isn’t a show around with dialogue this special. Take Hal’s tense reunion with Mr Snow in the cafe. Take George calling Mitchell “deadly furniture”. Take Herrick’s last speech in the cellar. Take Alex berating Hal for causing her death. Take the epic Captain Hatch speech in the finale. Take Ivan’s shruggles to stay clean (“I’m this close to wiping out an entire branch of Argos”) Take it all for goodness sake and annoy your friends by quoting it all the sodding time. Who cares if they have no idea what the hell you’re talking about.
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It goes without saying how strong the aforementioned actors are but Being Human was chock full of talent everywhere you looked. Sinead Keenan’s Nina was an undervalued character but a vital part of the story. It may be because she dumped George and challenged Mitchell as to why praise wasn’t heaped on in spades but it’s easy to forget that she started out human. Nina is us, the viewer, except she actually inhabits this strange world for the first time but still with all her natural instincts and moral convinctions at her core. In the second and third installments particularly Sinead deserved equal billing.
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Then there was Herrick, the greatest baddy there’s ever been. On the surface he looked about as threatening as a lamppost but Jason Watkins took a great villain on paper and twisted him into something special. He acted his socks off with knowing smiles and wicked grins. So good was Watkins that on Herrick’s grand return he made us think the old rogue could have some redemption inside his cold, cold body. Silly us.
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The acting credits are an impressive rollcall featuring respected names such as Donald Sumpter and Phil Davis to early roles for up and coming performers. Craig Roberts played a perverted teenager in his forties, Alexandra Roach fell apart as a decomposing zombie, Sacha Dhawan hunted vampires so badly they slayed him and Sara Pascoe was a widow ghost mum. There are too many to mention because it’s bewildering and that’s before you hear who some of the writers are. As you ask, Tony Basgallop, Lisa McGee, Sarah Phelps and Jamie Mathieson to name some.
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Long story short, if you haven’t watched Being Human then make a start on it today. If you have watched it then do it again and again until Toby Whithouse is in 10 Downing Street and its script is taught on every school syllabus. SHOW NO MERCY.
Roisin Conaghty returns for a second series as Marcella and while her character might be falling apart at the seams, Roisin herself has raised the game with this improvement on the first run. Marcella’s family are still weird, her love life is still a mess and to make matters worse her crap therapist has a crappy sidekick. It’s still quirky and potty mouthed, just more so. However, the ending might mean GameFace has reached its endgame.
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19: Taskmaster – Series 9 (Dave)
After an iffy eighth installment at the start of the year when the contestants didn’t seem to gel and the tasks weren’t up to scratch, Taskmaster came back firing on all cylinders. Everyone was brilliant. Ed Gamble’s competitiveness made up for Jo Brand’s lack of interest and David Baddiels general confusion. It was all brilliant and hopefully the move to Channel 4 won’t mess with a winning formula.
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18: Dead To Me (Netflix)
A farcical comedy with a dark heart. Jen has recently lost her husband in a tragic accident and soon meets Judy at a support group. Her world is about to be flipped over again as the two become close friends with a lack of trust as the unspoken third wheel in the relationship. Dead To Me is a sensitively played out story with plenty of laughs and emotional pathos.
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17: Catastrophe (Channel 4)
Sharon Horgan and Rob Delaney’s potentially final installment as a bickering, troubled couple offered plenty of the gross out moments and arguments we’ve come to love over the years but there was an even sharper edge this time round. We loved Sharon and Rob through some very questionable behaviour over he years nd that is a credit to the writers . Sharon and Rob. If this is goodbye then let’s at least end on good terms.
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16: Brexit: The Uncivil War (Channel 4)
A riveting take on a very British storm. In parts factual and in parts exaggerated, The Uncivil War was a comical spoof which summed up the ridiculousness of the whole thing. Let’s face it, facts aren’t important these days anyway. Benedict Cumberbatch plays Dominic Cummings, the man behind the madness as we see see his methods behind the political revolution. It’s a fun, engaging thrill ride which can’t be said of Brexit itself.
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15: Sex Education (Netflix)
A bright, bold tale of teenage sexuality told through the eyes of Otis who ends up giving advice to fellow students despite having no direct life experience himself. Sex, drugs, body image and bullying are just some of the topics handled in a direct and funny manner. It pulls no punches with the headstrong storytelling. The setting is actually the main thing that causes unease because its British students dressed as American students in a British school which looks like an American school. It’s very discombulating indeed.
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14: The End Of The F***ing World (Channel 4 / Netflix)
The teenage tearaways Alyssa and James don’t get things any easier when a woman named Bonnie who is set on revenge comes into their lives. Still artfully shot and masterfully told, the story surprises in the direction it takes. The End Of The F***ing World is lo-fi Tarrantino set in Britain and it’s still f***ING brilliant.
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13: Santa Clarita Diet (Netflix)
The gruesome foursome of Shiela, Joel, Abby and Eric continue their take on surreal suburbia. The show with all its gore and lunacy has impressed with every series. There’s not much new on the plate here but to stay urgent and hilarious despite that is credit to the performances from a pitch perfect cast. Netflix, like Sheila with her victims has cruelly cut Santa Clarita Diet off in its prime. We left things on a cliffhanger that could have taken the show to new realms. It’s sad to say goodbye.
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12: The Capture (BBC1)
Holiday Grainger plays D.I Rachel Carey who gets caught up in a world of make believe that takes her straight to the heart of conspiracy and law. Shaun Emery, a recently cleared British soldier is the man at the centre of it all and how can he prove his innocence when the evidence shows otherwise? The Capture is a thrilling emotional rollercoaster with twists that’ll mess with your head. There is style, substance and almost certainly a second series in the offing. When do we start?
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11: Year Of The Rabbit (Channel 4)
Think Ripper Street visiting Garth Merenghi’s Dark place hospital in Victorian times. Got it? Weird isn’t it? Matt Berry plays Inspector Rabbit and yes, he’s being very Matt Berry here but it suits the madness. Rabbit teams up with Mabel and Wilbur to solve crimes in ways only they can – badly. Quick-fire jokes, great visual gags and complete nonsense are the order of the day and it’s an absolute riot.
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10: Guilt (BBC Scotland)
Max and Jake are brothers for better or worse and in Guilt, mostly worse. Late one night they drunkenly kill an old man with their car and what follows is a tale of cover ups and repercussions. Through it all they meet Angie, an American with her own secrets. Guilt is a steadily paced farce that questions whether family is really stronger together.
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9: Dead Pixels (Channel 4)
Meet Meg a gamer who has a mind murkier than some of the darkest frogs of the internet and her curious gaming friends. They don’t want to live in the real world but their fantasy lives within the game blur into every aspect of their day to day. Dead Pixels is fun, rude and genuinely funny as fuck. Meg and Nicky are completely awful people but just like them we can’t keep our eyes from the screen. The mashup of in game play and standard settings is a visual treat.
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8: Giri / Haji (BBC2)
The English translation of the title is Duty / Shame. Kenzo is carrying out his duty, Yuko is his shame. Giri / Haji is set in Tokyo and London and the beautiful cinematography perfectly captures both cities. The direction throughout is crafted with an exception eye for detail. Kenzo is a detective sent to London to find his missing brother, who’s been involved with the Yakuza and accused of murder but the ramifications are the heart of the matter here. Giri / Haji is brooding, intelligent drama with plenty of revelations.
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7: Line Of Duty (BBC1)
Line Of Duty was almost back to its best after a disappointing fourth series. Steven Graham as the main antagonist was a big reason for this but throwing Ted Hastings in at the deep end was the real masterstroke, taking AC-12 into uncharted territory. Our little hearts couldn’t take Ted being corrupt and the way writer Jed Mercurio weaves in so much from the show’s history means the viewer can never relax. The levels of complex storytelling are unparalleled. This run was short on the long interrogation scenes, maybe as a way of not turning into a spoof of itself. The ninety minute finale was tense event telly at it’s very best. Is the strange ‘H’ reveal at the very end a double bluff?
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6: Ghosts (BBC1)
Horrible Histories goes ghastly ghouls on our asses and comedy is a better place as a result. There’s still that brand of humour from them we love but with a slightly more adult twist. Alison and Mike get the keys to a rundown country house but the dead inhabitants don’t taken kindly to their new housemates. They’re all larger than life characters but Lolly Adefope’s Kitty might be the standout. What follows is a madcap twist on the genre. Ghosts is odd, charming and already commissioned for two more series.
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5: Peaky Blinders (BBC1)
Peaky Blinders took a change in direction this year and it wasn’t to everyone’s taste. This was a study of Tommy’s personal demons. Read all my reviews of series five here and cast interviews here:
From the mind of Joe Gilgun and starring the man himself, Brassic offers a working class way of life not often given airtime on television. Brassic is Vinnie’s fight against depression but told through the medium of stealing ponies, bum exposing wrestles snd getting stuck in sewers. His gang of friends, with Dylan his closest buddy pulling away from him, get themselves in all sorts of scrapes with diminishing returns. The opening monologue of episode one is a northern take on the famous ‘Choose Life’ diatribe in Trainspotting and sums up Brassic’s mantra from the off. Though however bizarre things may get Gilgun and fellow writer Danny Brocklehurst manage to keep it grounded. Crude and sincere in equal measure, series two follows in 2020.
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3: Pure (Channel 4)
Newcomer Charly Clive excels as Marnie, a 24 year old sufferer of ‘Pure O’, an extreme form of OCD that involves near constant violent, sexual and taboo thoughts. She runs off to London but can’t escape her own mind and Pure is the engrossing tale of her adjusting to her new life and getting to grips with her illness. There’s awkward thumbles, workplace terrors and difficult friendships aplenty but her brain is the biggest hurdle to overcome. Pure is a realistic, heartfelt and refreshingly honest work.
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2: Years And Years (BBC1)
Russell T. Davies covers fifteen years through the eyes of a family that sees a rapid, frightening shift of the world’s axis. Back near the start of the year it already felt like an uncomfortable watch as what should be sci-fi was almost mimicking our daily news. A few months down the line and the show’s themes are even more relevant. Covering so many big political and technological moments in a domestic setting is the biggest achievement of many that Years And Years achieved. Read my reviews of all the episodes here:
Stranger Things 3 is the brightest, boldest and funniest series yet. There wasn’t just a tone change but more urgency and a different sort of peril. If series two felt like a rehash of the original run then this subverted expectations. There’s so much to love from Steve and Dustin’s bromance reaching new levels, the introduction of Robin, the cynical heroics of Hopper and so much more. Using the mall as a centrepiece was another masterstroke as well because we needed to see more of Hawkins, we needed to see these great characters in different settings and different situations. It’s rare for a show to improve as it goes on but Stranger Things has done so in style. The gut wrenching ending pulled the rug from under our feet and it looks like we won’t be seeing anymore of Hawkins at all from now on.
For today at least, the roles are reversed. Having been tucked away somewhere at the unit base revising her lines, Joanna Scanlan is now the one facing questioning. In a tiny canteen by journalists that is. No night in the cells will follow this encounter. We hope anyway. Three years ago the post-watershed British public fell in love with Joanna’s incredible performance of DI Viv Deering. She was an instantly classic character.
It must be tiring playing such a high intensity character, all day everyday for six months? “I do find it tiring, I’ve found it harder this year because it’s the first time we’ve ever shot in the winter. I don’t know if it’s real but it feels like its been a longer and harder winter and of course Manchester is very wet so we’ve had to contend with a lot of outdoors and night shoots and we actually had to stop filming during that snow. It’s been a big challenge this year. I have more of a say in how we tell the story. Writing requires standing back a little bit, looking at it and letting something filter down and land on something. It’s very hard to act and write at the same time, to have that editing mind and the acting mind. It’s almost like you get hijacked as an actor by the character.”
Was it daunting to return to Friday Street? “I was excited to do a third series. The first series you’re finding it, the second series you’re consolidating it and I feel there was a lot we achieved in it. I felt that potentially the third series would be the best series.” Do you still feel that now? “At this stage it’s almost impossible to know. We’re right in the middle of what I call the spaghetti with all the different strands crossing over”. Does this third run bring a new dimension to the show? “The first series was personal. Deering had her own in-built drama, the enemy was within. The second series was quite abstract and this one is a bit of both. It’s a balance of the personal and political stages.”
How does Friday Street respond to the events? “We’re motivated to bring justice but they carry on working tirelessly. They find themselves in a complicated web they didn’t appreciate existed which are local but have national implications. It’s a web of dark forces. Is is all as topical as it sound? “Things are moving so quickly both geopolitically and domestically that it’s hard to know if it is going to still be topical. We’re in a very volatile political arena, it’s definitely in the wake of Brexit.”
The new blood in Marilyn Merchant is clearly a welcome addition too “I really enjoy working with Claire Rushbrook. We’ve never worked together before. She’s a boss but she has sympathy with Deering’s intentions, if not necessarily the methods – they’re even neighbours! There’s a quirk, I suppose it could get edited out where she’s moved into the house opposite so there’s a sense of mirroring between them. It’s as if they are two halves of the same woman! That’s been a really nice relationship, lovely to play.”
Viv is a very complex person but what do you think are her qualities? “She never has any moral indecision. She has absolute integrity. She’s courageous, selfless. She’s vulgar – shameless, to use a phrase! Brave too, she has massive emotional intelligence and as such is a good team leader. Her faults are all forgivable. As I see her she’s rebellious and there’s the hypocrisy in using the authority of the crown but being anti-authoritarian but she’s only ever using that to a good purpose so I find that forgivable. To play her, you do feel like you can say what you think. In life I would be more cautious and think through the consequences of saying what I think but actually Deering doesn’t so it probably does rub off a bit on me!” Joanna herself is softly spoken, contemplative and gives every question thorough examination before giving out enlightening and detailed responses.
How do you get into the Viv mindset? Does costume help? “I don’t wear any of the clothes she wears. I don’t wear tight skirts, tops. leather jackets and high heels but actually when you put it on for Deering it’s a complete transformation. I think the process of changing is the adopting of the character. It’s a bodice that becomes armoury!”
Meanwhile at Friday Street there have been strange goings on. “They have a set of loos on the set that are obviously fake loos and they’ve been repeatedly defecated in! They don’t flush, there’s no water in them!” This sounds like a new investigation is needed. Maybe it could be the premise of the next series should it be granted. “We think people have been breaking in. Those loos have been put to ill purposes i’m afraid! The first series it happened because someone made a mistake! This time it has happened more times than it should and seemingly at points where no one should have been in there. I remember someone saying it was in three of them so it’s more than one person unless they’ve got the vast bowel of being able to spread themselves across three loos in one incident!” Are the toilets still a focal point in the show? “It’s for the lighter and more intimate moments. It’s where things can be said that you wouldn’t say in the office. They used to do that in Ally McBeal! There are very significant scenes in the loos.”
What about a fourth run, where do you think the show can go? “Whatever magics itself into being. It’s really worthwhile and saying something about society from an unusual angle. I don’t think there’s any other British telly that takes the same stance because there’s a levity in it and also a joyfulness and energy. That’s quite an unusual cocktail i think. If you go out seeking controversy in broadcasting you end up looking like a bit of a twit. It looks obvious that you’re trying to go for shock value or sentimentalism. I think when controversy strikes it’s often very unexpected because of some context that’s changed. When you have something like #metoo’ or #timesup and something you put out may not be favourable to women is going to read very differently and create a journalistic storm. I would say that we are trying to be truthful to societies current possibilities rather than seek or succeed in having any controversy.”
We leave Joanna to go back to learning her lines which, and I’m going out on a limb here, will be performed to perfection. It’s so good to have Viv Deering back. Television hasn’t been the same without her.
Lisa McGrillis is set to play one of your new favourite No Offence characters. It might be because you’ll love to hate Caroline McCoy or hate to love her. Why? Well, she’s a politician. “I’m a grass roots mayoral candidate, I’m up against a sea of grey when it comes to the other runners. Viv is an old friend of my mum who has passed away so Viv and Caroline have a close relationship of old. It’s quite an interesting dynamic when my character is running for Mayor and she’s with the chief of police and everything that goes with that.”
“She grew up in the same estate as Viv, the Cinderly estate, which is very working class and I think that she’s a voice to a generation. It’s a different community there now. People aren’t mixing, there’s two separate communities. She wants to make a positive change but with the values that she believes in. There’s more to Caroline than meets the eye, she’s got an agenda. She’s a very intelligent woman but people can relate to her. I think the audience will warm to her because she’s the underdog.”
Lisa insists McCoy isn’t based on anyone in particular “But I think Nicola Sturgeon is a great role model for women. She’s young, people can relate to her, she’s not in her sixties and she’s not a man! Caroline is really fresh and new so I did look a little bit at Nicola for reference because she doesn’t necessarily speak like a politician sometimes, she speaks like she could be a friend or a neighbour and that’s why people warm to her I think.”
What does Caroline bring to the show? “I love how headstrong she is. She’s a go-getter who gets what she wants and won’t stop until she gets it. I think that’s a brilliant quality. She really stands her own ground which is fun to play. When she speaks everybody listens. When she walks into the room everyone stops.”
“The audience see her a lot in front of the camera. She always has her aides around her, cameras are flashing in her face so she’s always got a front on. Even in her make up, she also wears very bold and sharp clothes. There’s a lot of scenes where Caroline is on stage talking to the people, you see a lot of the campaign”. Andy Burnham need needn’t fret just yet though. “It’s made me think how politicians are always on display, having to say the right thing. They have to be so switched on all the time that it must be exhausting.”
Lisa is on a career high, fresh from two series of the smash hit BBC2 sitcom, Mum. “Claire Rushford has just come over to me a said “OMG Lisa, I have just realised that you play Kelly in Mum and I’ve been working with you for four months!” That’s possibly the best compliment ever!”
How different is it playing a politician in a big city from the smaller world that ditzy Kelly inhabits? “Caroline is in a different world to Kelly which is brilliant. It’s so lovely to play such a contrasting character after the success of Mum. It’s very easy to get typecast and this is the first job I’ve had since and it’s very different. Mum was a bit of a game changer, I have to say. It opened doors for me that were definitely shut before. It’s one of those jobs that don’t come along very often but when they do they certainly make a huge impact. We’re doing a third series which I think we start recording in September”.
Lisa actually has a bit of a past with her new show too. “I am a huge fan of No Offence, in fact I auditioned for the first series. I read for both Dinah and Joy. That’s going back about five years. Obviously it didn’t go my way but I then went on to watch it and completely loved it so when the opportunity came up again I was “YES! Get me in!” I probably did go in quite desperate!” Desperation? That’s perfect for playing a politician! Not long now until we cast our votes on Caroline McCoy. Truth be told, with her confidence she probably won’t need them anyway.
Will Mellor (DC Spike Tanner) doesn’t look his normal self today. As he invites us into his cosy caravan he’s more welcoming than a certian chain of hotels but he doesn’t look much like Will Mellor. “I have to go under cover in this episode and I didn’t know how far it was gonna be until today. I think it looks good, the make up team have done a great job but I could not have a beard. It’s a) itchy and b) food, drinks anything, You end up with hair in it and there’s nothing worse than getting hair in your food! Imagine everytime you eat or drink you’ve got a hair in it. EVERY TIME! Gone are the days you could complain in a restaurant and say there’s hair in your food. I’m not surprised!”
What can we expect from the new series apart from a bit more.. hair? “There’s loads happening and it’s a very powerful opening episode. It’s going to be very powerful and anything can happen. I think when you try and guess this show that’s when it”ll catch you out. That’s what I love about it. I think you’ve got to be like that especially with other shows like Line Of Duty. We’re the kind of show where we never want to be safe or second guessed. There’s still that dark humour that comes through and some great new characters that come into it. We’ve got Nigel Lindsay, Neil Maskell.. we’ve got some great actors that bring something else to it”.
Things are getting very political, what do you make of series three’s direction? “I think we’re right on the money with where the general public are on terrorism. We’re dealing with a little bit of that this series as only No Offence can. It doesn’t pull any punches and it goes where other series are frightened to go. There are some attacks on Muslims and there’s a far right group that take it too far. So we have to deal with that. There’s a lot of political stuff going on and we have to be the moral compass. We’ve seen evidence of that in the press and that’s why we’re white hot with it and I think Paul Abbott likes to be current and we have to be. We don’t ever want to date ourselves. There’s some really heavy subjects but there’s still that comedy undertone, especially Nigel Lindsay’s character Terry Taylor, he’s got a bad odour problem that Spike has to deal with! Terry is not very politically correct. There’s a lot of humour in there. It’s a hard hitting, fast paced series. It’s got everything: Guns, far right groups, terror plots, politics. There might even be a little bit of romance for Spike!”
It sounds very spectacular. “He (Abbott) likes to start it off with a bang. In series two we blew up a chapel. This one won’t disappoint, I guarantee you that. When I read it I was “oooh!” and my wife was ‘what?!” and I said I can’t tell you but Jesus Christ! Even I had to take a break and put it down a minute, The shit hits the fan.”
In the previous two outings the No Offence hashtag on Twitter has abuzz with positivity for the show. What kind of reaction do you expect from Twitter? Given the sensitive subjects do you expect it to kick off? “I hope it does go off. I think we should be like that. I don’t want to be safe. Safety isn’t where I want to be in my career. The show should never be safe. This show should be anything’s possible, anything can be said. It’s called No Offence. That’s what it means. No offence but that’s what we’re doing. That’s the world out there. We can all believe that everyone’s politically correct and we can all believe that this doesn’t go on but it does. We’re here to show that this does go on and right or wrong we should show it. What we’re making is a drama but it opens a debate.” Are there any references to the bombing at the arena last year? “We don’t name the bombing but Deering gives a speech where she mentions we need more funding and it says we’ve been under attack in Manchester so there is a little mention.”
It seems like Spike and his colleagues are more on the beat than at the desk this year. Is that something you enjoy? “I like doing the action stuff, I haven’t done enough of it and this series when I got it I thought “that’s good” until I did it at three o’ clock in the morning in November, pissing down and freezing cold! I got hit a couple of times but that’s part of it. A few aches and pains but mainly it’s rolling around on the freezing cold floor – sober! I wouldn’t mind if i was pissed on new years eve! It was minus something and the ground was frosty and they had to keep wetting it down for continuity because when we first shot it it’d been raining. So being sprayed with water before you go for a take in minus three isn’t good but that’s part of it.” Will is clearly revelling as the only male in a female dominated main cast. “I love it. I wanna be a leading man. That’s where I’m aiming. I’ve always wanted to be an action hero! That’s where my dream has always been.” So, speaking of hashtags, let’s get #MellorForBond trending.
Will’s enthusiasm for the show is infectious. “It’s a different series. We’re on our third and who knows how far it’ll go. The viewing figures were double last time. It’s the biggest export from England into France. That baffles me! After this I’m going to France to do some appearances with my beard on! For as long as this show runs I’ll do it.”
Later in the afternoon we get to see Will in Bond audition mode at the stunning gothic surrroundings of Rochdale town hall. On the way in Lisa McGrillis says hello and goodbye to us as she leaves having finished her scene. We watch with deep interest as Will and a few other cast members film a typically strange No Offence moment. There’s nothing I can tell you about it but I can tell you it will be beautifully lit. Spoilers.
Saira Choudhry sits before us with her lunch on her lap having been whisked away to perform press duties but any vein attempts to actually eat it are soon forgotten. You’d think a performer would be grumpy without grub to fuel their genius but not Saira who is beaming away and talking at a high speed in her broad Manchester accent.
She plays the confident and brassy PC Tegan Thompson and we need to know if she’s still going to be a force. “Yes, she’s still a force! She’s got a lot this series and I’m really happy about it. I’m also really happy I get to work with my daughter. Leah is playing a teenage girl who has a goat! She auditioned about three weeks ago . She’s only done one job before this so it’s a massive thing for her. I feel blessed being able to work in the same scene, Not many actors get that in a lifetime. We’ve not shot the scene yet but I’m a great lover of animals so it should be fine!” Yes, it’s the goat scene crime drama never knew it needed. Let’s just say, you won’t want to miss it.
Acting is obviously in the family blood. “I’ve got my own drama school called ‘TV Talent’. It’s for kids in Manchester and they come in a do some supporting artist work in one of the episodes. It was great for them to spend a day on set and experience what it’s like. it was great day for everyone. I got so many messages from parents and children saying how brilliant it was to experience it and meet the cast.
What’s in store for Tegan this year? “My relationship with Stuart is still going, that’s always up and down and we have some issues that go on as well. It’s really good stuff we’ve got this time. I think they work because they’re such opposite energies and they don’t work for the same reason. Tegan probably needs to give Stuart a bit of a break! She’s hard on him but I think he likes it! Away from romance, is there fun to be had on the mean streets? “I’ve got some really exciting stuff for episode six which I’m really looking forward to. Tegan gets into a bit of danger. It’s probably one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced in my career. I’m really excited about it, there’s some really heavy stuff. It’s a life or death situation. The action stuff is what I love most to be honest. The fast cars and chasing criminals around. it’s exciting.”
Saira tells us that she’s filming a stunt soon but we’re assured that it won’t involve jumping over a Goat “Maybe I could suggest that. I’m not holding my breath.” In keeping with this more rigorous series the wardrobe has had an upgrade. “They’ve changed the uniform for the combat stuff. It feels so much better, it feels so much more right for the job. Beat cops are there to run after people and be physical. It felt like the old uniform was very officey.”
What do you like about playing Tegan? ‘Her strength, she’s very good at her job. i like the fact she’s quite feisty. Sometimes she’s says things without thinking. I think Tegan is very ambitious and looks up to Deering because she’s such a force. Tegan sees herself as a younger version, someone who’s going to grow into that.”
No Offence is notorious for being open-minded and brave, do you feel that’s missing from most television? “I think this show offers diversity. I don’t think it pigeonholes anybody or goes into stereotypes. Some programmes still do. We need to be more open-minded and just see people as people and represent that as well. I think this show does. When I first got into acting I got asked to do these roles that were stereotypical Asian girls. I was totally against it because for one I’m mixed race, my mum’s Irish and my dad’s Indian. That in itself was an experience, my whole life was like East Is East! I refuse to do that and I think it’s our responsibility as actors, writers and producers to show the real world how it is.”
Saira is taking a different route to her own child. “I was at college when I had Leah and I took a couple of years out and then I went back to uni because I thought it was never going to stop me doing what I was going to do. I went back to uni and did a course on TV and radio and then realised I wanted to be in front of the camera so I left there and went to a place called ‘Manchester School Of Acting’ for six months and got an audition for Hollyoaks which was my first job and I was there for three years! I can still say it’s a great training ground.”
She went on to form her drama school when leaving Hollyoaks. “I was twenty five but playing fifteen year olds! I used to get a load of teenagers following me round the supermarket asking “how did u get in telly?!” I thought there’s a demand for this, people want to know. I hired the local leisure centre and was absolutely inundated. I started to really enjoy it so opened one up on the other side of Manchester and there’s now six. Whenever I’m not filming I will be there to teach but our drama school is all about creating confidence. It’s not all about acting, it’s about them believing in themselves. If you wanna be a scientist go do that, if you wanna be a teacher go do that. Have the belief to be able to it.
Shooting locally certainly brings an air of nostalgia as Saira is one of the only main cast members who doesn’t need to put on an accent. “This is a brilliant job for me as I only live ten minutes from here. I get to work for five months and go home to my life which I think is important. Location filming to me is quite special as it’s in Manchester. It might be where I’ve been to college, where I first went for a drink or near a friends house. I remember shooting on a market in series two and I went to that market when i was eight with my Nana, I never thought at eight id be shooting here. It felt special.”
Is a return to the cobbled streets of Corrie on the cards? “The first time I went in everyone was “you look like Tina”. People say it on the street but I don’t think people have looked at me in No Offence and thought that. It’s a compliment, you can’t complain about looking like Michelle Keegan! I’m flattered. I would do Coronation Street again. I had one of the most amazing experiences when there. The cast made me feel so welcome.”
Is police work something you could see yourself doing? “The police do an amazing job and risk their lives everyday and we don’t really think about that. I’m not that brave. On set a lot of our supporting artists are either still in the police or ex police and they tell us everything we need to know. They tell us how to use the hand cuffs and how to swipe the baton! They do it a lot better than me though. I remember when I first put the uniform on in series 1 i felt like G.I. Jane but now when I put it on it’s like putting on Tegan’s skin. It just feels right.” We leave Saira to have a second attempt at lunch before putting Tegan’s skin back on and surprisingly, it too looks a little like Michelle Keegan.
Viv Deering has almost had as many bosses at Friday Street than Chelsea have had managers. Following in the footsteps of a Superintendant played by Colin Salmon and a DCI played by Sarah Solemani is acclaimed actress Claire Rushbrook in the role of Marylin Merchent. If you don’t know the name you’ll definitely recognise the face because she’s appeared in lots of fantastic television from My Mad Fat Diary to Linda Green and let’s not forget Spice World The Movie. What can we expect from this new form of authority in the show? “She follows the rules, she plays by the book. She’s pragmatic and proud to have to got where she’s got by doing so. At the same time she has a warmth and humanity about her. Shes professional and cool. She’s got no time for rule bending or anything that isn’t legit or straight up but it becomes interesting because demands are made of her as the series progresses so you see her loosening her black and white moral standards.”
How does Merchant, as a newcomer, deal with the dramatic events of the opening episode? “She deals with it in a cool, calm way, I’ve concentrated on keeping her compassionate . She’s got where she’s got by being cool, calm and level headed. She’s an outsider in that sort of respect. There is a lot at stake this series.” There sounds like there is more action this year, does Marylin get involved in any of it? “She remains upstairs so no stunts! I’ve got quite high heels so it might be a challenge!” So are we to take it that it’s not a job you would do for real? “Categorically not! It’s hardcore isn’t it. I have such respect for any one who does it.”
How does Viv react to Merchant? “Deering, whose track record isn’t quite as conventional has a slightly guarded response to this new boss coming in but they quickly find a common ground and mutual respect. It’s a cool but ultimately decent welcome from Deering”
What was it like to enter a well known show? “It’s intimidating because I’ve watched the show and I love the show and have long admired the brilliant cast and obviously Paul Abbot who I worked with a long time ago and have the upmost respect for. It was a big deal for me, the stakes are high and I knew playing a higher status character in terms of her rank takes a certain amount of confidence before going on set. Luckily though they were all absolutely charming and warm and welcoming so it’s a pleasure to have been invited to be a part of it.”
How was it working with Joanna Scanlan? “She’s fantastic. I’ve long admired her work. We enjoy the fact that often we’re on the same casting lists. There’s been parts that both of us have been up for that one of us has got so it’s been a real pleasure to acknowledge that in a lot of ways we’re similar actresses and part of similar pieces. I have deep respect for her having watched her in previous series and acting with her on set. She makes it seem effortless but it’s such a skill to juggle the humour and the charisma. Having played supporting roles in a lot of dramas I really respect these guys that are relentlessly in every scene of every day and going home to analyse for tomorrow. I know it’s not working down a mine but it takes serious dedication. She’s fearless and bold and it takes bravery to give a performance like that because it’s quite intimidating stepping over the line of playing it safe. She goes that extra mile. She does all that and manages to maintain real warmth on set. It’s a happy place.” It shows too, Claire’s smile fills the room.
Has Merchant any secrets you’d like to divulge? “Well, I’ve got lots of secrets that I’ve made up in my mind about her! But what you see is what you get. It’s been enjoyable to play the understanding that Deering and Merchant come to share and the respect deepens. She can see that Deering’s brilliance is often the result of her going off piste and we see her softening a little in terms of recognising the merit of that. Does Merchant’s character strike any similarities to Viv? “I’d say there are beautiful similarities” she offers with a cheeky grin.
This is not Claire’s first first time filming in Manchester either: “I did Paul’s series Linda Green with Liza Tarbuck a long time ago and Stepford Wives was another drama. I did Touching Evil way back and I’ve seen him over the years but so glad to be back in his gang. Paul and the other writers are genuises, the comedy is so subtle. Some of the lines I’ve been given do make me smile but its a seductive trap to fall down to start hamming it up. Heaven forfend any of us start playing it for laughs because then you’re sunk!”
No Offence is a show dominated by charismatic, interesting multi-layerd women but what does Claire think of roles for women in television? “It’s getting better for sure, I’ve enjoyed watching so many female led stuff recently but there’s a long way to go. In No Offence we’re everywhere! That wasn’t the factor though, the draw was Paul asked me to do it and that was the thrill. His scripts are always fantastic. I don’t tend to read scripts with that political head on. I didn’t audition for it which is very flattering but in other ways quite hairy too. He talked to me very much with the understanding that he thought I could do it and that’s what I’m trying to do!”
“Paul writes so economically and with such personality. It’s so rich that the whole experience is on the hoof, the team are forever working on it. the joy is not knowing where your character goes and it not mattering because there’s a lot to get stuck into. Some episodes I’m in just a couple of scenes but there’s plenty to be playing with. I laugh my head off and then I’m horrified!”
Claire says her goodbyes, the beaming smile is gone and then we suddenly remember we’re sat in a portable canteen on the car park of a sports centre. Oh well. Knowing No Offence, we probably won’t see it much on screen but at least some of her lines will make us laugh!
When Luke, our hallowed leader of Custard based television messaged me way back in January asking if I’d be able to travel to Manchester shortly and do something for the website I tentatively replied with a lame “not sure, it’s quite short notice and far away.” When he came back with the words “No Offence Series 3 press day” I literally peppered my private bits with breath spray and in a menacing Viv tone uttered “I’ll sort it. Count me in sugar tits.” I might not have said sugar tits.
For those not familiar with No offence, I suggest quickly catching up on All4 but how to sum it up up a paragraph? It’s a fact paced, dramatic, funny, inappropriate, sweary crime drama led by the magnificent Detective Inspector Viv Deering. A woman who would happily waltz into Gene Hunt’s kingdom and play Queen of the jungle. Written by the celebrated Paul Abbott (Shameless, Clocking Off) the dialogue is an electric mix of dark humour, unique insults and even, would you believe, some stuff about policing. In amongst all the madness there is no desire to shy away from serious subject matters either. The first series focused on the murders of women with Down’s Syndrome and the second had nods towards child trafficking. For the forthcoming series the show is not only about to get political but very current as it focuses on a far right group.
By the way, it’s cold up north isn’t it? To be fair it’s bloody cold everywhere. This set visit falling as it does between the ‘Beast From The East’ and its surprising sequel ‘Beast From The East 2: We’re Taking The Piss Now’. So, an overcast winter’s day in a far flung corner of Rochdale at a temporary unit base might not be the most glamorous location but its a perfectly apt one because it felt so very No Offence. Luckily, most of the main cast are in attendance today and the first arrival is the marvellous Elaine Cassidy who plays DC Dinah Kowalska.
This morning Elaine is dressed in a flowery dress which we’re assured is not a major tonal shift in her character’s development and is indeed her own garb. Thank goodness for that, we don’t want Dinah to be summery and cheerful! She is someone who on screen cuts an intense figure, always dressed in black and deeply ambitious about the job she loves. In the fifteen episodes so far she has certainly got herself into a few scrapes but her good heart is always what puts her there.
In keeping with previous series openers, the third installment begins with big shocks. Run over by the bus? Bomb explosion in a crematorium? That’s nothing compared what’s in store this time round. “It’s a personal journey for everybody in Friday Street, as always the job means so much to all of them. They always want to get a result” Elaine explains “Dennis Caddy is the head of a far right group called Albion and they know he’s involved at the beginning of the series. It’s about trying to take down Albion but in doing that they find out it’s not as straight forward as they initially thought. No case ever is. There are other people who are in the limelight in Manchester, who have influential jobs and it starts to get quite.. incestous as to who is in whose pockets. There’s a politician (played by Lisa Mcgrillis) who, when I was reading it I found quite an attractive character because she’s really ambitious and she’s come from nowt and its through her hard work and her tenacity that she wants to climb the ladder. She wants to get to the top and that is be the Mayor of Manchester”.
What does series three offer for Dinah? “Dinah’s personal journey has comparisons to series one. This case is kind of similar to year one because there is a personal connection to wanting to get a result, not just caring about the job and being married to it. There’s more at stake, there’s an emotional drive to what keeps her going. You really see Friday Street pull together as a team as they always do. They get tighter when things get tougher”.
No Offence as a show hits fast and moves faster, the story lines operate with a blink and you miss it policy. The new run offers new blood for fans to fall for. “There’s a few new characters who I think will be really entertaining for the audience and that’s fun from Dinah’s point of view, to see whether she likes them. Dinah hates the establishment which is an oxymoron. Viv’s probably the only boss she’ll accept so she’s really protective of Viv. It’ll take her longer to thaw out because there’s a new DCI that comes in” (Marilyn Merchant played by Claire Rushbrook).
Is Dinah still getting herself into terrible situations and thriving on impulse like she used to? “I don’t think she’s got it that wrong this year, like in year two with Norah Attah where the whole thing was recorded and..” Elaine pulls a concerned face, “..the chasing someone under a bus! There’s not really been the time for her to cock up as the stakes are too high”.
Elaine won’t just find her name in the credits once this time round because she’s also an associate producer for this third series. “If I have a question about a scene or a suggestion for little changes, if I think that it’s right for Dinah because a writer won’t know her as well as I do. For instance, she never calls Viv ma’am which she should do but she never did that in year one so whenever they write in “ma’am” I always just cross it out and go “LOOK!” Viv is like the mum but they’re also best friends but there’s also the respect that she is the boss. Ma’am could be anyone so she saves that for DCI Merchant who she doesn’t like! Then there’s Nigel Lindsay (Victoria, Safe) who plays Terry Taylor but everyone calls him Terry-dactyl and Dinah doesn’t like him. There’s loads of people she doesn’t like! I think she doesn’t like new people either. She’s protective of Viv.
Does the dynamic change at all between Dinah and her boss? “They’ve always been close so there’s no animosity. They always know when to challenge each other but a lot of the time they’re on the same wavelength. When it comes policing they do go off the book whereas Joy (Alexandra Roach) always does it by the book so they are more maverick in that way.”
This afternoon Elaine is shooting a scene in Rochdale town hall but is it easy to adjust from her natural lilting Irish tones to Mancunian? “If I’m doing a full day filming I always try to get a little bit of a sleep in because that’s always the first thing to go, its sort of like exercise as you’re using your mouth in a completely different way so it’s like doing a yoga with my mouth. By the end of the day you start slurring your words”. Elaine leaves to change into clothes more fitting with the season and perfect her northern brogue for her afternoon of filming. Gone will be the bright dress and on will come that famous leather jacket so at least she will be warmer. Did I mention it’s cold up north?
Based on Lottie Moggach’s 2013 novel of the same name and written by Skins co-creator Bryan Elsley, the first episode of Kiss Me First plays out like a lethargic music video more than a scripted drama. For the most part a piano tinkles repetitively as the gist of the arc slowly unfolds. We are introduced to Leila (Tallulah Haddon), a shy, troubled teenager who has recently lost her mother (to the grim reaper, not just down the back of the sofa) and escapes her problems by entering a virtual world of robotic voice acting and garish colours. Known as Shadowfax, we see her in the happy side, play fighting with a friend until she follows a woman who seems to have a habit of staring at her from the woodlands. That’d get people arrested in the real world. We discover this is Tess (Simona Brown) who, even more creepily tracks her down in real life and invites her to a club. As you do. There’s lots of sexuality and trouble emanating from Tess’s real form and her avatar guise too.
Leila soon stumbles on a place called Red Pill which is a paradise land beyond the known virtual world: She meets a motley crew of discombobulated voices and the computerised interactions between the group have all the expression and personalty of a conversation on Made In Chelsea. Tess’s avatar name is Mania so take cover as one of many big crashing waves of metaphorical obviousness crash in. The rest of the group are Calumny, Force, Jocasta, Denier, Tippi, Laa-Laa and Po. The last two might be made up. It seems Red Pill is run by someone called Adrian but here’s betting the reveal will be Charlie Brooker laughing maniacally as we discover it was him purposefully sabotaging Brian Elsley’s script all along.
By referencing The Matrix with Red Pill, even referring to it via a Wikipedia page, it strangely dates itself. In a world where movies were doing this twenty years ago and Black Mirror is currently setting the benchmark for bleak, technology inspired dystopia, Kiss Me First is willfully pitting itself against proven classics it will be difficult to emulate. As if that wasn’t enough, the themes at play here are being covered this very week in a big Hollywood film by some guy called Steven Speilberg (Ready Player One). So with these three comparisons it seems to be behind the times, not as well written and outclassed in budgetary terms all at once.
However, the thing that made the forty five minutes drag most was the show’s stubborn desire to take itself way too seriously. The only glimmer of humour comes from Jonty (Mathew Aubrey), Leila’s new pant flashing flatmate. More screen time for him will be a blessing and hopefully he’ll end up in the virtual world and liven things up there. All in all, first impressions aren’t promising. We are told two key things about Red Pill. The first being “You can feel pain” and if that’s not going to be the ultimate metaphor for the series then spank us and call us Tyler Durden. The second is that “what’s inside you, what you’re hiding, it will come out” and we’re presuming they’re not talking about last night’s Shepherd’s pie.
Teen issues are hinted at with one of the Red Pillians (go with it, yeah) having an abusive father in his real life and it’s obvious Tess is going to have her issues too. Hopefully there will be focus on each of the characters and that may expand this restricted world a little. A virtual reality needs to be exciting and provocative and we are told nothing of what this world entails other than some people hang out there. Real life, even with its rubbish weather and bloody G-tech AirRam adverts is more appealing than this. 4/10
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