My Top 30 Shows Of The Decade! (2010-2019)

Now that we’ve ticked over into a decade that actually has a name it’s time to process a time that many have named a “golden age” in television. By the way, if you’re one of those people who actually think the twenties start in 2021 then stop reading this blog because you are clearly insane and need help. And a calendar. When we’re born we’re not suddenly aged one are we?! There’s a bit of time between! They’re called months!

–

Sorry, where was I? Ah yes. Here is my personal list of my favourite shows of the last ten years. There’s no Fleabag because no matter how good it is there’s the inescapable feeling that it is overrated. There’s no Game of Thrones either. I saw the first episode and once you’ve seen Emelia Clarke naked it’s not going to get any better than that is it?

–

This has been an intense work about a great passion of mine.. TV that is – not Emelia Clarke’s bum. That’s a blog for another time. Feel free to debate, disagree and even rave about the show’s in my list. It’s all a matter of opinion. There will never be a definitive list because art speaks to us in many different ways. These are the show’s that made my heart beat faster, made me laugh and made me cry. God bless television…

——

30: What Remains (BBC1) 2013

David Threlfall couldn’t be further from Frank Gallagher here. As Detective Len Harper he finds himself on the other side of the law in this claustrophobic whodunnit. When the decomposed body of a woman is found in an apartment all of the houses residents are suspects. Intriguingly and thoughtfully paced, What Remains is an underrated work.

——

29: Catastrophe (Channel 4) 2015-19

From a dysfunctional couple to an even more dysfunctional family, creators Sharon Horgan and Rob Delaney put their namesakes through the mill with a mixture of highly developed intelligent comedy and plenty of potty mouthed goodness. A warts and all look into modern relationships.

——

28: People Just Do Nothing (BBC3) 2014-18

The mockumentary on a mock pirate radio station kurupt FM. Consider yourself mocked with strange garage beats and the ridiculous adventures of a gang with the common sense of school children. Funnier that Craig David’s back catalogue, People Just Do Nothing has a unique flow and poetry to its comedy.

—-

27: Rhod Gilbert’s Work Experience (BBC Wales) 2010-18

It’s official, Rhod Gilbert can make anything funny. In one of the episodes he works in a hotel and changes beds yet manages to weild more laughs than Basil Fawlty achieved before serving breakfast. He flies a plane, becomes a vet and even poses as a male model. However, what truly makes the show is Rhod’s gruff, cynical and quick-fire narration. His unrelenting one-liners prove he should stick with being a comedian.

——

26: Doctor Foster (BBC1) 2015-17

Suranne Jones gives a powerhouse performance as a woman betrayed by the equally screen stealing Bertie Carvel. It’s a small town show with grand ideas, some of them absolutely barmy, but Mike Bartlett’s script pushes the intrigue and suspense to extreme levels. It’s a theatre play portrayed as a glossy small screen spectacle. Doctor Foster is about the complexities of adult relationships but with a heightened, melodramatic fizz.

—–

25: Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle (BBC2) 2009-2016

You know Stewart Lee, you’ve seen him. On the telly. His Comedy Vehicles are thirty minute, meandering diatribes and they are essential. Between his takes on “The UKIPS” and Chris Moyles, Lee berates himself and the audience in ever decreasing stages of madness. Iconic television that deserved more love.

—–

24: Broadchurch (ITV) 2013-17

It’s easy to forget the cultural impact of Broadchurch back in the first season. The nation was hooked on the mystery of Danny Latimer’s death but it was in the harrowing effect on the local community where writer Chris Chibnall really struck gold. David Tennant and Olivia Colman as Hardy and Miller, two cops thrown together, were the definition of chemistry.

–

Yes, series two was a bit of a letdown but the change of direction in the last run got the show back within touching distance of greatness again with a difficult subject handled with class. Series one won’t just be a classic of the last ten years, it will forever be a classic nonstop.

—–

23: Taskmaster (Dave) 2015-

Put a bunch of comedians in a room and you’re bound to be entertained. Get them to do ridiculous tasks and put them in a room to talk about doing the ridiculous tasks and you have an instant comedy franchise. Greg Davies and Alex Horne monitor proceedings in the hope things get out of hand and they often do. For instance, that time Liza Tarbuck got Alex to sit on a cake with his naked bottom.

——

22: Bang (S4C) 2017-

A multilingual crime drama based in Port Talbot, Bang was an intense thriller which was essentially about one single gun and the chain of effects it has. Dark, twisty and so beautifully shot the town itself was a main character. Stories are rarely told from these corners of Britain and the good news is there’s a second series starts in early 2020.

——

21: Stranger Things (Netflix) 2016-

It was acceptable in the 2010s. Hmm, not quite so catchy is it? The Duffer brothers piled on the nostalgia and dayglow horror to provide Netflix with one of their biggest ever hits. While evil tree branchy type things are the focus of the show’s evil, Stranger Things is all the classic buddy movies brought to the small screen.

–

Let’s face it, things with child actors are usually fucking awful but the show’s biggest success is how wonderful the main cast are. The third series saw an evolution and change of direction so hopes are high for the future of Stranger Things.

—–

20: Dave Gorman: Modern Life Is Goodish (Dave) 2013-17

Imagine Black Mirror if it was much more obscure and performed by a comedian. That’s the pitch. Dave Gorman is in the form of his life as he studies the intricacies of modern day living with his own unique perspectives. Be it online shopping, hassling Alan Sugar with billboards or furrowing the real depths of the internet – the comment sections. Cynical but warm, opinionated but friendly. Modern Life is Goodish was most excellentish.

——

19: Cucumber (Channel 4) 2015

Russell T. Davies wrote a study on modern day homosexuality through they eyes of Henry (the excellent Vincent Franklin) a middle-aged man who has his life turned upside down after a party that involves a death. He flees his previously stable relationship to house share with a flat full of young strangers led by 19 year old Dean.

–

In typical Davies style Cucumber is laced with innuendo and high energy plotting. It’s some of the bravest drama commited to television. It’s funny and heartbreaking and leaves you on a constant seesaw between the two. There is one particular scene that is so shocking it’ll effect you for days. You’ll know it when you see it.

–

While being crude without ever being tasteless, Cucumber was always about the bigger message. By challenging society’s perceptions of gayness and all sexuality it stands the test of time. The last, subtle line uttered by Henry is quite the ending for this one and done series.

——

18: Spotless (Netflix) 2015

Jean Bastiere’s life was perfect on the surface with his lovely family and big house but appearances are deceiving. His job could almost be a metaphor for he runs a business that cleans up after crime scenes. His world is turned upside down when his brother Martin visits with a freezer and a dead body inside. Like you do. What follows is a chain of events that spiral out of control, so much so they end up working for a mob by clearing up their dirty work.

–

Spotless is dramatic, cinematic and full of bleak humour in the darkest of circumstances. It’s the compelling story of a good man taken way out of his comfort zone but it’s Denis Menochet who plays Martin’s scruffy womanising bad boy with glee that steals the show.

–

As compelling as it was gory, a second series was on the cards but sadly it seems network wranglings have put paid to those hopes. We’ll have to keep Spotless as an eternal sunshine of our minds.

——

17: Misfits (E4) 2009-2015

Not all superheroes wear capes – some wear boilersuits. Cruder than Superman in a brothel, more disgusting than Batman’s coke habit but funnier than Ardal O’ Hanlon in My Hero. Seriously.

–

Five juvenile offenders team up to do community service but a freak thunderstorm gives them powers they don’t understand and the magical ability to kill all their probation officers. Clumsy.

–

If Misfits had been American then it’d have been glossy and the superpowers would have been useful. Instead these delinquents botch their way through misadventures while trying to shag eachother.

–

Misfits flows with energy and off-kilter weirdness. From the bizarre (sample line: “Fuck the Tortoise, Alex”) to the blasphemous (THAT nativity scene).

–

While it didn’t quite adjust to an entirely new cast with as much comfort as a certain show that is higher on this list, Misfits was and will always be a riot.

——

16: My Mad Fat Diary (E4) 2013-15

An eye-catching take on teenage life based on the real-life experiences and book of Rae Earl. It’s Sharon Rooney’s task to express Rae’s issues with body image, mental health and self-abuse and she does so with great dignity and humour. If this had been a movie and not tucked away on E4 then all the awards would have been falling at Rooney’s feet

–

Set in the nineties, My Mad Fat Diary tells the story of her interegration into a group of school friends, one of whom is Chloe, played by the then up and coming Jodie Comer. You may have heard of her?

–

Colourful, brash and highly inventive yet all that still ignores the kick ass nineties soundtrack. By using The Charlatans’ ‘One To Another’ as the theme song it was never going to do wrong was it?

——

15: Sherlock (BBC1) 2010-17

These Sherlock Holmes adventures set in present day London were full of writer’s Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss’ usual sense of wonder and wilful deception. Everything clicked from the first minute and in Benedict Cumberbatch a rising star shone brightly.

–

The feature length episodes flew by with the help of brilliant dialogue and eye-catching cinematography, a lot of which has been copied to death since. Sherlock was fun and over the top but it’s extremity was what made it a trendsetter. Incredibly crafted plotlines took unexpected tangients and series 4, which many hated, was all the madness spilling over. Did it jump the shark by the end? Yes. Was it still highly watchable crime drama with twists galore? Absolutely.

—–

14: Uncle (BBC3) 2014-17

Nick Helm plays the dishevelled Andy who is forced to be young Errol’s (Elliot Speller-Gillott) uncle in nature more than just in name and a beautiful if strange friendship results. So far, so very twee you’re thinking? Except it’s done under the influence of alcohol and drug addiction while bursting into inappropriate songs. Dylan Moran even appears as a wizard. Potty mouthed but full of emotional resonance, Uncle was a family pack of laughter.

——

13: Black Mirror (Channel 4 & Netflix) 2011-

Black Mirror’s first ever episode involved the Prime Minister fucking a pig and that’s one of the more normal plots that bears resembence to our times. Charlie Brooker’s anthology series on mankind’s relationship with technology might have dystopian overtones but sometimes the stories reflect the news in the months that follow transmission.

–

Dark, twisted, satirical, frightening and sometimes, just sometimes funny. A constant parade of strong casts and intriguing plots mean Black Mirror continues to be worryingly relevant and episodes such as ‘San Junipero’ and ‘Hang The DJ’ prove it’s not all doom and gloom.

——

12: Luther (BBC1) 2010-2019?

Idris Elba is commanding as detective John Luther. Sure, his personal life is complex but it gets a lot weirder when he runs into Alice Morgan (played with a devilish viguer by Ruth Wilson). Alice is a murderer our antagonist can’t lock up. Against all odds they form a crime fighting partnership which surprisingly doesn’t follow rules.

–

In short, Luther is a mad show. A crime drama that’s permanently heightened and that’s where the fun lies. Writer Neil Cross revels in the world of this alternative London with a dark hearted crime drama that’s both thrilling and extremely gory. It’s a near perfect balance of murder mystery and action. You’re either not into Luther or you’re along for the whole ride. Just don’t get the night bus, eh?

——

11: Happy Valley (BBC1) 2014-

Writer and creator Sally Wainwright had a prolific decade of not just hit television, but top quality television at that. Last Tango In Halifax, Scott & Bailey and Gentlemen Jack add to what was an already impressive CV but arguably the high-water mark is Happy Valley.

–

Sarah Lancashire is sensational as police sergeant Catherine Caewood, a woman struggling with her daughter’s suicide and living with her alcoholic sister. Tommy Lee Royce, played by James Norton who is clearly enjoying going dark side. Tommy has recently been released from prison. The thing is, he raped Catherine’s daughter and was ultimately responsible for for her death, not that he got locked up for that. His new found freedom causes fractures in catherines personal and work life.

–

Gritty is a word that could sum up Happy Valley as the backdrop for all this is a small working class town riddled with poverty and addiction. These are themes that run through the show.

–

The dialogue is so masterfully constructed and real to life and an impressive cast brings life to this little world with big problems. Wainwright has such a natural ability to make characters real and not just half-arsed sketches.

–

Despite such a huge chasm of time since the last series there is a third in the works but it’s likely we’ll have to wait at least a couple more years. The pace of life in the country is slower to be fair.

—–

10: Inside No.9 (BBC2) 2014-

From the, let’s say perverse, minds that gave us The League Of Gentlemen and Psychoville came a horror anthology as shocking as it was surprising. Reece Shearsmith and Steve Pemberton dreamt up the surreal, the creepy, the mad and everything else on the bonkers spectrum.

–

By it’s very nature there will be episodes that disappoint, it’s range of tone and subjects won’t translate to everyone at all times, but if you don’t take to one episode it’s likely you’ll fall in love with the next. When it excels it’s one of the best things committed to telly. The variation and depth of material is to be respected.

–

The silent episode ‘A Quiet Night In’ was the first hint that we had something special but the tone always shifts. Take ‘The 12 Days of Christine’ which is genuinely heartbreaking. Or Zanzibar which is a hotel based farce spoken entirely in spoof Shakespearian. In ‘Diddle Diddle Dumpling’ a man becomes obsessed with a stray shoe. There’s plenty more where that came from.

–

2018’s live Halloween special could have been the moment Inside No.9 ate itself but they mastered every detail to perfection and so high was the concept they got viewers switching off in droves. That’s art that is.

–

The new decade will usher in the fifth series and as usual we have no idea what to expect other the the number nine being involved. Who knows, maybe even that’s not a guarantee.

——

9: Detectorists (BBC4) 2014-17

In a decade where cynicism grew exponentially, MacKenzie Crook offered an obscure form of light relief. Tucked away on BBC4 and offering a comforting hug to those who discovered it in the ditches of the TV schedules, Detectorists was never really about metal detecting – it was about friendship. Hapless though Lance and Andy were the important thing is they were nice. That’s it. It’s not very fashionable is it? We willed them to be better with women. We hoped they would find their pot of gold.

–

Through stunning shots of the English countryside Detectorists brought a warm glow even if the weather conditions were drizzly. Lance and Andy nattering about nonsense was the heart of the show of course but no show is complete without a nemesis and in the ridiculous form of the ‘Antiquisearchers’ (or Simon & Garfunkel to be more precise) they definitely didn’t meet their match. So much comic gold was mined when the pairs squared up against each other.

–

Let’s also not forget the oddball characters that made up the Danebury Metal Detecting Club and their awkward, mostly pointless meetings. It all added to a small world with a big heart. This should go down as an all-time classic comedy, one that gave our flawed antiheroes the ending they deserved.

—–

8: Community (NBC & Yahoo Screen) 2009-2015

Meet Jeff Winger, a lawyer who finds himself at Greendale Community College after having his degree revoked. Jeff stands as the morale conscience of the show despite not having many morals. He meets dipsy Troy, geeky Abed, grouchy Pierce, bubbly Shirley, cutesy Annie and not so brittle Britta. They’re the seven dwarfs of pop culture references and meta comedy.

–

What starts out as pretty standard fare soon blossoms into a programme full of creativity and fierce intelligence. Community starts descending, or rather ascending into a world of crazy parodies and obscure ideas with the crazy dial up at eleven. There’s the spectacular episode where we visit many different timelines including Abed’s darkest. There’s the paintball episodes where Greendale keeps becoming a surreal shooting range. Then there’s the episode that is entirely animated. If these sound a bit too gimmicky then there’s the bottle episode where they’re in one room just looking for Annie’s pen.

–

Creator and lead writer Dan Harmon (now in charge of Rick And Morty) was absent from the often ridiculed fourth series which the show itself later referred to as “the gas leak year”. We had six seasons in the end but will we ever get the movie?

——

7: Mongrels (BBC3) 2010-11

RUSSELL HOWARD’S EYES! Yes this is a high placing and it’s fully deserved. Welcome to the back garden of a pub in the Isle of Dogs, this way madness lies. Maybe “welcome” isn’t the word because being called a cunt may not be considered de rigueur in polite society… and this isn’t polite society. Only posh fox Nelson could fall under that category for he’s a metro-sexual il Divo fan.

–

The rest of the puppet reprobates that make up the cast are Vince the sweary fox, Kali the bad pun pigeon and Destiny the selfish dog but the less said about her the better (if only they’d followed up on the hint that she’d died at the end of series one) Lastly, and certainly not least there’s Marion the bin dwelling cat who is many furballs short of common sense.

–

While clearly influenced by fast-paced American comedies, Mongrels revels in the shitness of Britain. It’s crude, lewd and even offensive if you’re of a certain disposition. No subjects are off limits and it proved more cutting than any satirical show out there. They managed to do this in stories about Marion getting stuck in a wheel and training Michael Jackson’s monkey to stop masturbating.

–

It’s scattered with pop culture references, some of which have admittedly dated in the past ten years but many still stick. There’s also lots of brief appearances from celebrities willing to be ridiculed. Let’s face it, some are more known than others. Who’s Paul Ross?

–

Then there are the songs, oh boy, those songs. Marion’s ode to his underage sweetheart Lollipop, Nelson’s tourist advertisement for Millwall (“No-one’s been stabbed here since Friday / Arson is on the decline”). The previously mentioned monkey singing of his desire to murder Justin Bieber. There are so many slices of inappropriate should have been hits.

–

The attention to detail in both the puppetry and blink and you miss them visual jokes show a real creativity that’s gone into making of the show. The voice work is exceptional too with nods to Rufus Jones as Nelson and Dan Tetsell’s baffling transilvanian accent for Marion being the true stars of the show.

–

Mongrels was cut short when in its prime as the best things often are, like Princess Diana and Fuse bars.

——

6: Utopia (Channel 4) 2013-14

Meeting people you know online in real life isn’t as frowned upon as it once was but if Utopia is anything to go by, perhaps it should be. Foul mouthed Becky (Alexandra Roach), straight laced Ian (Nathan Stewart-Jarrett) and the paranoid Wilson Wilson (Adeel Akhtar) had been chatting together on a forum about ‘The Utopia Experiment’. This is a graphic novel which allegedly predicted the disasters of the previous century but it’s the unpublished follow up which everyone thinks will save the human race, that makes people lose their minds.

–

This new strange alliance sets out to find the manuscript for good reasons but ‘The Network’ want it for bad and go on a killing spree. Neil Maskell is fascinating as the sullen Arby, the murderer who has his own catchphrase in “Where is Jessica Hyde?!” We, the viewer soon find her and she’s played with relish by Fiona O’ Shaughnessy.

–

In keeping with the comic book theme, the palette in Utopia is visually striking with its bright, bold colours where yellow is the stand out. Look very closely and you’ll see how much it subtly filters into virtually every element of the show. It adds to the uniqueness of a thriller that would stand on its own anyway.

–
The brilliant soundtrack supplied by Cristobal Tapia de Veer is another important factor. The electronic glitches and uneasy bleeps sit perfectly with the oddness of the world Dennis Kelly has created. Imagine The Chemical Brothers on antidepressants.

–

Utopia is darkly comic and comically gruesome. While not the fastest moving of shows, the storytelling, humour and sense of farce are what give the urgency. Never a show to play it safe, so much so that the first episode of the second run was a genesis story featuring none of the main cast. From humble beginnings to eugenics and the dark forces behind it, this was a television masterclass and it’s influence on television dramas that followed is clear.

–

Everyone on the screen is playing a blinder (that’s an in-joke for fans) but there are two stand out performances. Alexandra Roach embodies the opinionated and strong willed Becky with classic one liners and Adeel Akhtar’s nerdy, complex Wilson Wilson is so good they named him twice.

–

If Utopia has one major flaw it’s that there was no resolution. The story hadn’t finished and that is an insult to the writer, cast and fans. Series two ended on a cliffhanger and then Channel 4 pulled the plug. The Network were evil commissioners all along. There was talk of a streaming site taking it on but nothing ever materialised. There is however an American remake in the offing but that must be greeted with cynicism. The original story wasn’t fully told, why start a new one? There wasn’t a show like this before and there hasn’t been one since. Utopia is small screen paradise – if paradise involves a lot of bad language and killing.

——

5: Peaky Blinders (BBC1) 2013-

Back in 2013 the thought of Cillian Murphy playing a gangster would have seemed like we’d entered Abed’s dark timeline again. “Remember I’m an actor” he told writer Steven Knight when doubts were raised and what an actor he is. This slight, pretty man inhabited the demons of Tommy Shelby and made him walk tall into TV history.

–

Peaky Blinders tells the story of a family between two wars. Brothers Tommy and Arthur are struggling to cope after returning as soldiers. Their PTSD manifests itself in different ways, Tommy is the brains of the operation and Arthur is the attack dog. The Shelby Company limited sets up an illegal bookies and they also start exporting booze and drugs. Needless to say they get caught up with all the wrong kinds of people. Or wronger kind of people.

–

Peaky manages to be extremely violent and yet sumptuous to watch. It is crafted to near perfection to create a believable if grim world. Aesthetically no other show can compare as a period piece with this amazing interpretation of the times.

–

Backed up by a stellar cast including Helen McCrory and Sophie Rundle and guests such as Sam Neil, Paddy Considine and some bloke called Tom Hardy, Peaky Blinders continues to deliver shocks and emotional gut punches. Should we care so much about a criminal gang? Of course not but the combination of Knight’s writing, the remarkable direction, loud as fuck soundtrack and perfect cast means we can loosen our morals a little.

——

4: No Offence (Channel 4) 2015-18

Crime Dramas have been ten a penny the last ten years but creator Paul Abbott had his own take on the genre. Sure, there were elements of ‘Shameless’ in the DNA but this was like no show ever seen before. No Offence was chaotic, bizarre and hard hitting. It was fast moving and dialogue heavy, so much so it could almost be disorientating. Hilarious one liners and ludicrous situations mixed effortlessly with big issues such as the murders of girls with Downs Syndrome, child slavery and far right politics.

–

With all that going on you need the performances to pay off so step forward Joanna Scanlan as Viv Deering. Viv is intense, playful, hard as nails and vulnerable. Most of all though she’s funny as hell. There’s so many wonderful quotes that there’s no point going into them all. If she’s not using breath spray on her privates she’s breaking the rules in her own style. Deering has to go down as one the TV greats.

–

It’s not all about Viv though. No Offence is an ensemble piece and everyone has their moments. Elaine Cassidy as the intensely moral but wayward Dina gives the performance of her career. Alexandra Roach as the innocent but kick ass Joy is a revelation. Then there’s Paul Ritter having the time of his life as Miller, a man who revels in the moribundity of it all and takes everything that bit too far. He is outstanding and one of his greatest moments came when he shouted “I’VE GOT GOAT ON ME!” before licking it off his coat “No, it’s Curry” Oh, by the way, they blew up a goat with a bomb. Of course they did.

–

Sadly this year Channel 4 announced that No Offence was not coming back and that is a dreadful loss. Television needs brave, visionary storytelling like this. One day it will be considered as a classic and when it is Viv will be raising a wry smile knowing she was right all along. As always.

——

3: Car Share (BBC1) 2015-18

On paper Car Share had all the appeal of being stuck in traffic with Jack Whitehall as a your passenger. Frankly, the premise of two colleagues going to and from work is hardly something to get the pulse racing. In an age where comedies are fast paced, abruptly edited and over the top, Car Share proved there’s hilarity in the mundane and plenty of heart in the normal. While it defied genre norms it also set a benchmark by smashing iPlayer viewing records.
–

If you’re looking for epic plot twists and convoluted storylines then you won’t find them on the not so mean streets of Bolton. If however you want to see someone accidentally drink some piss then this is for you. It’s the mix of slapstick and intelligently observed long-form conversation that gives Car Share a warm, comforting feel and that’s nothing to do with the urine.
–

Charm is a word used way too often in TV circles but this has it in spades. Two opposites collide and the results are fun and often bizarre. John (Peter Kay) is a grumpy cynic worn down by years of middle management. Kayleigh (Sian Gibson) on the other hand is the bright, perky and sometimes irritating angel on his shoulder. John’s view out of the windscreen is a foggy grey mist whereas Kaleigh sees sunshine and rainbows through the same glass. The actor’s real-life friendship shows on the screen. Opposites attract as the wise prophet Paula Abdul once said.
–

Speaking of pop music, let’s hear it for the show’s third main character – Forever FM. The local radio station it’s ok to listen to. It’s upbeat music and oddball adverts soundtrack the show’s feel good tone perfectly. While your ears digest the cheese your eyes are distracted by ridiculous road signs and billboards. Ugly city landscapes are turned into comedy art. The attention to detail isn’t just in the script. Just don’t mention that dirty back window.

–

While Peter Kay is on top form, the undoubted star of the car is Sian Gibson. Her portrayal of quirky Kayleigh is totally endearing. No-one has delivered a line about an iceberg lettuce quite so beautifully.
–

There are so many classic moments from John’s loudspeaker call to his boss to Kayleigh’s neighbour going dogging. The standout might just be Reece Shearsmith’s appearance as a smelly fishmonger with anger issues. His scenes are full of such joy and the three of them together is comedy gold. Who doesn’t need a whiffy rendition of ‘Here Comes The Hotstepper?’

–

They almost messed things up by giving the second series just four episodes that culminated in an unhappy ending. Due to public demand they came back with two specials in order to prevent the politest riot ever. Curiously one was an unscripted special which basically amounted to a DVD extra. The finale made up for everything though with an ending that was happy but not overly saccharine.
–

Car Share first aired in 2015 and if you feel weighed down by all the gloom of current affairs then why not treat yourself to a rewatch and transport yourself back to more innocent times. Yes, it’s been a really long decade indeed but thank God John and Kayleigh were there to make us smile.

——

2: Line Of Duty (BBC1) 2012-

First put out in 2012 during what will potentially be our last ever summer of love, Line Of Duty was the antithesis of the countries mood. While everybody was preoccupied with the Olympics and being proud of our country AC-12 were rooting out bent coppers before it was fashionable.

–

Comprised of Ted Hastings (Adrian Dunbar) Kate Fleming (Vicky McClure) and Steve Arnott (Martin Compston) the anti-corrupton unit were hot on the tail of Tony Gates, a man they believed to be fiddling the figures. What seemed like a fantastic one series arc soon bleeds onto the new story of series two. Keeley Hawes took on the role of the hunted for one of the best moments of her career. From then on each new run catches you off guard and pulls your pants down. Everything, no matter how unconnected it seems, turns out to be part of a far bigger conspiracy.

–

Jed Mercurio’s writing is so intricate and clever. Things don’t make the final draft for no reason. The sheer audacity to stick to the conspiracy whilst throwing in curveballs as bullets is the sign of a master at work. In Line of Duty he has created a vibrant, suspenseful thriller, the like of which has not been seen before. Far from being boring, thirty minute interrogation scenes are heart racing slabs of perfect melodrama. The beat to those interviews are almost hypnotic.

–

Adrian Dunbar is in great form as Ted, a man so full of principles he might burst and let some secrets out. He’s authoritative, charming and has many a catchphrase to cause a chuckle in the most heated of moments. But every good man needs a nemesis and AC-12 has had its fair share so it’s worth mentioning that Lennie James, Keeley Hawes, Daniel Mays, Thandie Newton and Stephen Graham have all been worthy adversaries. All villains with shade and complexity. If they walked on stage at a panto they wouldn’t get booed. They’d be greeted by confusion. Mainly because five year olds won’t have watched Line of Duty. Craig Parkinson’s excellently sinister Dot would not only get booed but kicked out the theatre – by the children’s parents.

–

2020 will see our favourite anti-corrupton unit (BOO TO AC-9!) return. Is Ted really dodgy? Will Arnott buy some more waistcoats? Just remember one thing – don’t trust anyone.

——

1: Being Human (BBC3) 2009-2013

“So a werewolf, a ghost and a vampire decide to live like humans do. They get jobs, a house and a TV license. They make friends they will lie to, take lovers they will infect-in fact, the only part of humanity they successfully adopt is its ability to deceive and destroy”

A small scale domestic drama with a supernatural twist. It’s a simple houseshare premise but this time the inhabitants are a vampire, a ghost and a werewolf. The scope of creator Toby Whithouse’s vision meant BBC Three’s modest little show transcended it’s humble beginnings. The balance between mundane domesticity and ambitious science fiction is just part of what makes Being Human truly special. This isn’t grandiose Dracula style mythology nor is it tepid Twilight / Vampire Diaries nonsense.

–

Initially set in Bristol with Mitchell (Aidan Turner) George (Russell Tovey) and Annie (Lenora Crichlow), series one could almost be classed as the innocent times. Innocent here translates as bloody killings, haunting your ex from the grave, being accused of fiddling with kids and a gruesome battle with an arch enemy. The masterstroke is that all these things happened between conversations about mouli graters and Marigolds. This balance continued perfectly throughout all five series. Switching between brooding intensity and full-on funny within seconds came naturally to a show that never played it safe. There were two mass murder sprees and a baby was blown up yet this doesn’t come close to describing the blood shed or services rendered as Mr. Snow might say. This deep mood is darkened further by composer Richard Well’s atmospheric original score.

–

Being Human evolved further with a move to Barry Island and enforced cast changes that would’ve been a stake through the heart of most shows. In series four and five we were gifted with newcomer Damien Molony and his awkward bromance with Michael Socha’s Tom which, along with a move deeper into science fiction territory gave proceedings a new lease of life when it wasn’t thought to be needed. Kate Bracken’s Alex soon completed a new trio that weren’t given enough time together because the axe fell in 2013. While general consensus lies with the original trio being the best, what followed them is extremely underrated. The first three years may have been more consistent but when the last two years peaked the episodes were equal to and sometimes even better than the original incarnation. ‘Making History’ stands atop a very busy podium.

–

One of the biggest factors in Being Human landing the top spot is the dialogue. Oozing with quotability and natural conversation, everything flows so bloody well. There isn’t a show around with dialogue this special. Take Hal’s tense reunion with Mr Snow in the cafe. Take George calling Mitchell “deadly furniture”. Take Herrick’s last speech in the cellar. Take Alex berating Hal for causing her death. Take the epic Captain Hatch speech in the finale. Take Ivan’s shruggles to stay clean (“I’m this close to wiping out an entire branch of Argos”) Take it all for goodness sake and annoy your friends by quoting it all the sodding time. Who cares if they have no idea what the hell you’re talking about.

–

It goes without saying how strong the aforementioned actors are but Being Human was chock full of talent everywhere you looked. Sinead Keenan’s Nina was an undervalued character but a vital part of the story. It may be because she dumped George and challenged Mitchell as to why praise wasn’t heaped on in spades but it’s easy to forget that she started out human. Nina is us, the viewer, except she actually inhabits this strange world for the first time but still with all her natural instincts and moral convinctions at her core. In the second and third installments particularly Sinead deserved equal billing.

–

Then there was Herrick, the greatest baddy there’s ever been. On the surface he looked about as threatening as a lamppost but Jason Watkins took a great villain on paper and twisted him into something special. He acted his socks off with knowing smiles and wicked grins. So good was Watkins that on Herrick’s grand return he made us think the old rogue could have some redemption inside his cold, cold body. Silly us.

–

The acting credits are an impressive rollcall featuring respected names such as Donald Sumpter and Phil Davis to early roles for up and coming performers. Craig Roberts played a perverted teenager in his forties, Alexandra Roach fell apart as a decomposing zombie, Sacha Dhawan hunted vampires so badly they slayed him and Sara Pascoe was a widow ghost mum. There are too many to mention because it’s bewildering and that’s before you hear who some of the writers are. As you ask, Tony Basgallop, Lisa McGee, Sarah Phelps and Jamie Mathieson to name some.

–

Long story short, if you haven’t watched Being Human then make a start on it today. If you have watched it then do it again and again until Toby Whithouse is in 10 Downing Street and its script is taught on every school syllabus. SHOW NO MERCY.

–

The Cry (Episode 4 Review)

The two extremes of Joanna and Alistair are magnified more than ever for the finale, with their coldness at opposite ends of the spectrum. He cheers with euphoria as the case is scaled down while Jo feels nothing. He wants another baby, a book deal and the hypocrisy of working at a charity for abused children. There’s also possibly the most unromantic marriage proposal ever to grace our screens. Joanna, however gradually knows she can’t move forward with Alistair and that means escaping his control. Her future lies away from manipulation and rubbish sex.

Joanna isn’t free from dishing out the mind games herself and she starts by seducing him with the promise of being the perfect wife as long as he takes her to where Noah is buried. As Jo starts taking control, Alistair shows a sign of weakness as he all but to confesses to his mother who, judging by all her concerned facial expressions, knows the truth.

The revelation finally comes to Jo via a letter from an old lady that places Noah as being alive after they landed at Melbourne airport. Through Jo’s imagination the writer even gives a knowing look as she seals the envelope and it is a chilling moment despite being predictable. It’s in keeping with all the twists, they have never been a surprise but the tension is expertly done. The drama is in the emotion.

A showdown on the Moors ensues where she forces him into confessing his sons and forces him off the road in the process. Joanna stands in court, seemingly about to confess the entire truth, only to actually take on Alistair’s bad habits by delivering a speech (un) worthy of the man himself. For all her frailty we’ve seen over the four hours there’s also been an arrogance post the murder. This speech had it in abundance. She believed she’d get away with it and she did.

There was lots of lovely little details to admire in the finale. Like when they’re viewing a home and Jo asks “where is he?” about Noah and as if it was just casual conversation Alistair says “Here, let me take a photo”. And in the way, once free she bought the house and lay above the burial spot in the exact same way as when she thought he was at the tree. We also get an explanation of the title sequence as the car flies off the road.

It’s touches like this that justifed all the leaps in time that The Cry has been criticised for. It made every scene, every big bit of dialogue ambiguous and suspicious. It made us the viewers analyse more because we got glimpses of the future. If it had been delivered in a linear way the show wouldn’t have been as compelling. The concept making it bigger than the sum of its parts. The Cry was occasionally frustrating, sometimes stunning, with two showpiece performances from Jenna Coleman and Ewen Leslie.

The Cry (Episode 3 Review)

 

The Cry thrives on a claustrophobic form of suspense and does so with conviction but not all the designated shocks hit the mark. It’s no surprise that Noah died as a result of the wrong medication on the plane but it is horrible to see Alistair carrying out his dead child in a bag in order to bury him. It’s certainly no surprise either when it’s revealed that Joanna is in court for the murder of Alistair but it’s still a mystery if Noah’s body was ever discovered or if they actually got away with it.

Where The Cry shines most is in the softer, more human touches. The moment where they discover Noah dead is brutal in its simplicity. There’s a long shot of the car as the parents panic. You can hear their pain and it paints a thousand bleak pictures. When Jo runs towards an incoming lorry it sets hearts racing and is very well done. No doubt Jenna Coleman’s insurance went up just that little bit more too. The pay offs don’t live up to the expectation but the joy (if that’s the right word) is in the expectation.

The third installment traces Alistair’s journey from Mr Nasty to complete monster. Ewen Leslie is the star of the show, serving up his most engaging hour yet. The circle of lies drawing in Jo, Alex, the police and the media. His cold, bloody minded intensity shows a man falling apart at the seams. Joanna is at breaking point too but for different reasons, her guilty conscience threatening everything. While her personal shame grows so too does her confidence to stand up to her man.

Did Jo realise her quest to tell the truth before she murdered Alistair? Actually, did she even murder him? Maybe Alex did? Were a few of them in on it? Let’s not rule Chloe out because she’s been under the radar so far. Finally, was it really Jo that administered the lethal dose or is it simply a case of Alistair manipulating again and covering his own back? Lots of questions and only an hour left to cover it all. The answers may not be where the entertainment is but for the finale they really have to be.

 

The Cry (Episode 2 Review)

If time is just a construct then so too is patience and The Cry tested both to their limits in its second episode. It’s frustrating that after such a dramatic conclusion to last week we’re guided through the first half an hour in a typical whodunnit fashion. All effort is made to make Alexandra look like the culprit between the court proceedings in Glasgow and Peter, a police officer who not only looks reluctant to question her also arranges a secret meeting with Alistair. It’s not exactly a subtle narrative in a show that so far has tried to bewilder and confound. The trouble is that for thirty minutes the story doesn’t progress. There are some little ambiguous moments such as Alex cutting up his passport and her knowing looks to his mother.

This show should be better than vague nods and knowing winks and it’s a relief when it proves this in the second half but dear God, it felt like a journey to get there, more so than that bloody flight to Australia. Joanna having a fake social media account is intriguing, to say the least. Is it a case of morbid curiosity or something altogether more sinister? The novel way in which the comments on her feed were read out by people in the same room was an effective touch.

The first staggering moment comes when Alistair takes his work into his relationship, spin doctoring his wife in how to act for the press. “The world wants to see your pain. They want to see a good mother crushed” he says coldly and those aren’t exactly the words of a compassionate husband. He comes across even more controlling and unhinged with each scene. He’s the Antipodean equivalent of Alistair Campbell. Never trust men named Alistair is the real moral to this story. Maybe more worrying was Joanna’s response of “Am I a victim?”

Suddenly the drama tap has been turned on and it’s pouring revelations. Alex is arrested as a result of potentially stalking behaviour but ironically for an episode that didn’t cover much ground we leave it at the exact same point we were at sixty minutes ago – but with a twist. Noah was never in the baby seat and as Joanna counts over the credits a nation spits out their collective drinks in shock and puzzlement.

So what is there to go on? We don’t see baby Noah after the flight and we now know the day he disappeared. Did they accidentally over medicate Noah on the plane? More specifically, was it Alistair who gave a fatal dose considering he was the one holding the baby as Jo slept? The argument on the road that we see a slight glimpse of through the eyes of a truck driver is clearly very important. They had been talking of an incoming storm on the radio and that fight, when we finally get to see it, might be the epicentre.

While there are questions, where the heck is the CCTV from the shop’s car park? We have seen Joanna through one such camera and we’ve not heard a thing about it. Or was that simply a mistake by the director? More than one person has to be in on it. Whatever it is. Are they all involved? Answers on a postcard but the series will have ended by the time it gets here.

Trauma (ITV) Episode 3 Review

 

As with Doctor Foster, you can tell that a playwright is responsible for the machinations of Trauma. Mike Bartlett likes to focus on the consequences of actions. There are no grand set pieces here. Most scenes have two people face to face, sitting opposite each other across tables, or squaring up to each other in a wild state. There are four sections of tonight’s closer that involve Dan in every one. It’s easy to visualise them all taking place on a small west end stage. At least you wouldn’t get any ad breaks in the theatre.

The first act sees Dan lie his way into Allerton’s home. He deceives Alana with a story about picking up a suit and in a nine minute scene manipulates his way, both into the house and her opinions of her father. After the game playing, Bowker goes dark, stealing her phone and cutting the landline before pulling a knife on her.

Act two find Lisa arriving home to find Jon there. Through the method of a different lie he gets back into the house and gradually twists the metaphorical knife before revealing the actual one. It’s the small details that stand out for Jon as he becomes obsessed with the grandness of their home, taking in the interiors such as expensive light fittings. His hate seems to be deepened by the family’s money and comfort.

The third installment sees Lisa and a not dead Alana face off with Jon before Allerton crashes through the door. “I want you to know how it feels to have your child about to die. A stab wound, under the ribs, left hand side.” An eye for an eye. A daughter for a son. A lot of Jon’s rage is directed at authority and the system he’s been fighting against for years in a working class family but as his weapon presses the neck of Alana the truth comes out. Jon admits to making a mistake that night. Someone does end up in hospital and it’s Dan at the hands and feet of Jon’s snapping point. Other than a few bruises there is no blood shed, no lives lost and refreshingly it feels like a realistic end for a drama.

The final act finds Jon visiting Dan at his hospital bed and the conversation is essentially two stubborn men at loggerheads. Neither press charges because they both want it to be over. In this case the truth is as important as justice and there’s truth in both sides of their arguments. Allerton offers plenty of words but sorry is not one of them. The truth is, none of these people are bad people. Dan was a man lost in grief, carrying out the actions of someone not in their right mind. He won’t take it further because he’s got the only justice he felt capable of achieving – the truth . Making Allerton lose the respect of his family was the game plan all along. Temporarily affecting his career was just an added bonus.

As the “ghost” of Alex takes leave of Dan’s imagination he soon symbolically emerges in Jon’s home. As if the guy hasn’t been stalked enough already.  It’s a happy ending of sorts for Dan and Susie in that there’s the promise of future happiness but for Jon, Lisa and Alana the family portrait has been smashed firmly onto the floor by distrust. Last night’s meat in this three part sandwich was average at best but the plot points proved to be necessary in setting up a strong, emotional denouement. 7/10

 

 

Trauma (ITV) Episode 1 Review

Perennial drama stalwarts John Simm and Adrian Lester come face to face in a battle of wills that’s more concerned with morality than anything else. It’s a hospital procedural without the technical lingo and west country accents. It’s a crime drama without any of the forensic detective work. Simm, who is omnipresent on the day Trauma airs because he’s also appearing in Collateral on BBC1 at the same time, plays Dan Bowker, a father of three down on his luck. On the same day he’s given notice of redundancy his son ends up in hospital after a knife attack. The cause of the crime isn’t the main issue here, it’s strongly implied a school friend did it as an act of girl related jealousy but the focus is placed on the cause of his death in hospital and the fallout from it.

As a panicked Dan comes to his son’s side in the hospital halls he’s alerted to trauma surgeon Jon Allerton’s (Lester) casual approach. He’s assured his son’s condition is not going to be fatal. In true TV fashion he breaks in (or rather walks in unchallenged) to the surgery room to witness the operation and finds himself further concerned by the man in charge of a loved one’s life. Of course, he needed to see this for the sake of the storyline but it is an overused cliche. Minutes later Dan and wife Susie, played by the brilliant but thus far underused Lyndsey Marshal, are told of his death and what follows is a battle of wills in a similar vein to last years Liar. It’s not like a character played by John Simm to distrust a Doctor is it?

Of course, we know Dan isn’t hiding anything but is he imagining something that isn’t there? Like he did when picturing his dead boy in the park? The harassment by Bowker is unnerving at times but it’s understandable given his situation. Simm plays the heartbreak  and bitterness well, never leaning into unsympathetic territory. Yet. He stalks Jon on the internet, he hangs around the school of his daughter and he makes the surgeon’s words come back to bite him. From little things like “I’ll be be back in five minutes” to the acceptance he had drinks on his birthday which, due to internet research we soon find out was the same night of the operation (Jon was called in on a night off). Will all this boiling resentment and bitterness result in Dan doing something incredibly stupid and/or dangerous?

Allerton is holding his cards close to his chest but as Dan spotted, his eyes are telling a different story entirely. the surgeon walks and talks with charm and confidence but guilt covers him like paint on a canvas and Lester shows the two sides of the canvas well. We’re never quite sure what he’s thinking. The powerful funeral scene is an excellent example of this. Bowker stands in front of everyone (including a certain medical professional) to express how angry he is, how he wants to hold someone responsible, how the loss of such a young life is a waste. Yet despite this, Jon approaches them afterwards with kind words before the accusations fired at him show worry behind those eyes.

It’s not clear what relevance Allerton’s family have in all this but they have much more screen time than Dan’s. In particular, daughter Alana’s relationship and work ambitions. As this is written by Mike Bartlett, a playwright and the man responsible for Doctor Foster, it’s likely the seeds have been planted with good reason. It’s a compelling opening that sets up plenty of intrigue. At times the music may be almost as intrusive as the offending knife but that’s a phase gritty dramas are going through. At least there weren’t any shots of people staring out to sea. 7/10

 

 

Doctor Foster (Series 2, Episode 3 Review)

The best dramas will always engross and surprise in equal measure and writer Mike Bartlett does both with aplomb in an episode where everything feels more grounded and realism is to the fore. There are no character decisions that grate, no motivations that make little sense. After last week’s strange happenings this is the biggest compliment going.

Every minute is gripping as the toxicity of Gemma and Simon’s relationship finally meets head on. After suspension from school , Tom heads back to mum’s house with both guardians at his side. Gemma offers her estranged man to stay for dinner but he should have known an offer of any meal with broccoli in is hardly putting forward the hand of friendship. Things get hot in the kitchen like in R Kelly’s ignition and after placing her mobile phone against a bread bin (that rhymes too) the doc strips to her frillies. Even though the filming is spotted they soon take matters to the living room in a session that can be more easily described as hate-fucking rather than love making.

Thank God for Anna who translates what the viewers have been saying for a while now. In a passionate take down of Gemma’s behaviour she says in no uncertain terms that her actions are ruining Tom’s happiness and that there is life away from Simon and more specifically there is life away from Parminster.

At last, the consequences are coming to fruition (bounce bounce bounce). We learn just what effect his parent’s mind games are having. From the anxiety we already knew about, Tom has aggressively forced himself onto his friend Isobel and shown himself up in a public fit of rage. It’s a clarion wake up call and one that not just Gemma needed, but the show needed too. We get an admittance of sorts, where she talks of a love still present. “You miss him as a father, I miss him as a husband. You knew what he was like but you went back anyway. I did the same. It was wrong”.

The layers of Simon’s duplicity are shown in full technicolour. He agrees to work together over Tom but emails the school over a transfer behind Gemma’s back. He conceals the information regarding Isobel from his mother too. He turns his back on a heartbroken Tom once Kate decides she doesn’t want him at their house. Unsurprisingly given his past, he feigns ignorance about the previous nights steamy affair. If only Tom had revealed the truth on that driveway rather than exclaiming “WHAT?!” to his dad’s “We’re married mate, we don’t hide things from each other”.

The proverbial rug is pulled from under our feet. The closing five minutes not only feel like a series finale but finishing touches to the entire show. The truth is there are still one hundred and twenty minutes to go so quite where things go from here is anybody’s guess. The same rules don’t apply anymore. Doctor Foster has gone off the map. We can be fairly sure that though Gemma has left Parminster, Parminster probably hasn’t left Gemma. 10/10

Doctors notes:

• It’s still unclear what Simon told Tom to make him turn on his mum.
• Will Kate find out about the affair and will it be the downfall of Simon?
• It’s still a mystery where Simon and Kate got their wealth from
• James probably wasn’t a plant in the end but his bad taste in jumpers means forgiveness is long off.
• When Gemma was escaping the wedding it just looked like she was scuttling away to go for a pee behind the hedge. It’s exactly this kind of insight you read this blog for isn’t it?
• While leaving a wedding without saying goodbye is rude, it’s not the worst offence committed in the show.

TV Review: The Replacement, Episode 1 (BBC1)

 

A psychological drama about an architect who becomes pregnant may not, on paper have us reaching eagerly for our popcorn but this looks set to be a show that has little interest in conforming to any expectation. There’s a strange sense of unreality that binds it all together and not in a bad way. It certainly share’s that DNA with Doctor Foster but if you mix the Suranne Jones drama with series two of Line Of Duty you end up with The Replacement. It’s a brooding, melodramatic and strange opener but it’s addictive for reasons not overly clear.

When Ellen (Morven Christie) becomes pregnant the company looks to find cover for her maternity leave and up rocks a confident, sassy Paula (Vicky McClure) who bowls everyone over, including Ellen herself. However much the new girl has ideas above her station it’s no real surprise when the script starts twisting our perceptions of the instantly likeable Ellen but Christie’s show stopping performance means her acting muscles are suitably flexed. The sweet, ambitious woman we see at the start soon starts escalating into an almost obsessive jealousy and paranoia. Is it justified though? McClure walks the tightrope of super keen new employee and sinister life wrecker magnificently.

There are so many other themes touched upon in this electric opening salvo. Mental heath is introduced as part of Ellen’s back story. We learn she has suffered from depression and that’s how she met her psychiatrist husband Ian (an annoyingly handsome Richard Rankin). This show even shares unethical medical practices with Doctor Foster. It serves as an obvious weapon by which to question her current stability but could likely prove a huge red herring.

The biggest theme is focused on society’s treatment of pregnant women, not just in the workplace but in general. Ellen’s body no longer feels like her own as she’s prodded by cooing strangers (no jokes please) and patronised when wanting to do any work. The life she owned feels like it’s slipping away. Her spirit and independence now solely defined by the baby she’s carrying. She’s even judged on her lack of excitement and fobbed off that she will understand things more once she is a mother. As if her opinions and decisions before birth will suddenly be deemed redundant.

There a little touches that offer hints of what’s to come, literally in the case of the creepily hands on David (Dougray Scott) but the ending comes crashing out of nowhere. As did her boss Kay (Neve McIntosh). Right before Ellen’s eyes. Through her beloved skylight of all places. It’s a gripping opener and as long as it doesn’t descend into a murder mystery, has the promise to be one of the most bonkers things on the television for a long time AND a great advert for condoms. 8/10

Up in the sky(light)

It’s no doubt Paula got Ellen suspended but she had to go and be cunning and do it by the rulebook didn’t she? Teacher’s pet.

So who did push Kay? David? Ian? Paula? A nearby pigeon?

 

TV Review: Apple Tree Yard, Episode 4 (BBC1)

“Courts aren’t about the truth. They’re about who tells the best story”

The sex in public, the family politics and the vagaries of the legal system have pushed us to this conclusion where the fate of Yvonne Carmichael is in the hands of twelve strangers in the jury rather than the one stranger who led her here.

The court proceedings are wonderfully done and charge forward purposefully with brisk powerful punches of all the information we need. At no stage does it drag or feel like ‘Series Two Broadchurch Syndrome’ (now a recognised television disease).

The more he sits silently in court, the more Mark Costley’s aura of mystique is taken away from him. The flesh of his lies reduced to mere bone. We learn more about his past – the time he was inappropriate with a former work colleague and his previous conviction. There are even two conflicting accounts on whether he has a personality disorder. One doubting Thomas declaring “his pursuit of extramarital sex and a tendency to embroider the facts do not mean he’s mentally unwell .Otherwise half the men in the country would be seeking treatment” Touche! However, a Doctor claims he does suffer from one and Likens his behaviour to acting like a movie star in his own movie. 007 has truly lost his shine.

The knife twists further as Yvonne takes to the stand and has to relive the assault and the the day of the murder. If that wasn’t tormenting enough the big reveal is to follow, the big reveal to Gary at least, when the question “Are you familiar, Doctor Carmichael, with the small alley way called Apple Tree yard?” comes crashing in like a wrecking ball. And no, Miley Cyrus wasn’t called as a witness.

As if emotions haven’t been shredded enough there’s one last twirl of the dramatic blender as the twist kicks in. We get a flashback, yes that devious old trick, but this one is worth it. As they lay together in romantic clinches she jokingly says “I want you to kill him” and perhaps with more serious intent “I want you to smash his face in”. Costley proudly declaring he never told anyone this information is a bit like a cat bringing home a dead mouse wanting some applause. Her steady response of “People can say anything. You really can’t tell the difference can you?” may mask an agenda we’ve never seen before.

It’s a belting end to a show that’s been all about the issues of trust and people living false narratives. As for Costley, on the plus side he now has a confined space all to himself where he can create many filthy stories with that vivid imagination. 9/10

Blind alleys

Full marks for the healthy discussion of mental health issues. Very refreshing to hear.

It’s up for debate if Yvonne knew what she was doing when asking Mark to kill. Was she much less innocent than we thought? Did she know Mark was a bit of a fantasist who would take it literally? Or were they really just throwaway comments?

The look to camera at the end suggests it wasn’t the latter.

He could be out in five years on good behaviour. Which alley would the sequel be set? Answers on a postcard.

We’re all googling for places with rude names now aren’t we?

TV Review: Apple Tree Yard, Episode 3 (BBC1)

“What have I done?”

Give a Monkey a baby and heating element and the results are up for debate but give an intelligent, romantically naive woman enough rope and they could end up hanging themselves. It turns out Mr Costley wasn’t delivering take away food to George Selway but take away life. As they flee from the house Mark says that everything will be ok if she goes along with his story. She is the getaway driver to a crime she doesn’t know exists.

Yvonne now faces trial for murder / manslaughter / aiding and abetting / generally being gullible / you name it. If your heart sank at the realisation that a lot of this episode would involve legal and court based wranglings then there needn’t have been a worry. Nothing dragged as the dramatic beats were placed well throughout. There was the first arrest at a family meal (wise choice, considering take away seems so dangerous these days), Gary’s knife wielding speech to the the smug barrister and then the second arrest for text messaging her accomplice.

The relationship between Yvonne and Gary blossoms for the first time. He has previously been portrayed as a cold, distant man but here he offers hugs and all manner of unflinching support even though it’s clear he knows she had an affair. Essentially, if those things were on the table in the first place then his wife may not have strayed towards a potentially psychopathic murderer. Let that be a lesson to all you chaps out there.

Emily Watson transcends her earlier performances with multi layered aplomb and the direction is at times disorientating to match her panic, confusion and upset. The biggest message being that even the most intelligent, articulate people can fall for the most blatant of lies if their heart lets them. Her blind faith in her imprisoned lover extends so far that she thinks sleeping with her own husband is cheating on him.

The big reveal is what we’ve all suspected but Carmichael herself was to blind to see. Mark Costley does not work for MI5 and for all we know, might just be a glorified janitor. He is a fantasist where Yvonne was just in love with the mystery, and like all good mysteries this has us on the edge of our seats. 8/10

Blind alleys

Will Mark escape murder charges on account of his mental stability?

It’s not looking good for Yvonne. Surely she’ll be sent down for manslaughter at least?

Is her daughter’s pregnancy being signposted as a big part of family life Yvonne will miss due to moments of recklessness?

How much is Gary wishing he’s blown that £100,000 on something else? A new car maybe? Or divorce papers?